Chapter XCVII

Amber sat at the table, coffee cup lifted to her lips though she wasn’t drinking.  Instead she was simply breathing in the scent as she let her mind wander over the events of the previous two days.  The rest of the household was scattered about – some back to watching their charges; the others elsewhere in the house.  So for the moment she had the kitchen and the coffee to herself.  She let her thoughts slide by the announcement of Saphira’s death and their subsequent encounter with Michael and focus on the talk with Esmeralda that came after. 

Esmeralda had by turn appeared distant, resigned, angry and depressed, but Amber felt somewhat confident that Esmeralda would at least make an effort to finish their assignment.  She did have to question what Esmeralda’s methods would be like, however.  Given what she had done the day before, Amber figured pretty much everything was going to be fair game in an effort to get Charisma and Brianna to make whatever choice was necessary to wrap things up soon.

A hand on her shoulder startled her, and Amber hissed as hot coffee splattered her hand.  She set the cup on the table forcefully though not hard enough to allow spillage again.  She turned baleful golden eyes at the intruder, then accepted the ice that Esmeralda handed her with a gracious nod.

“You all right?” Esmeralda asked with concern, though her voice was a bare whisper.

“Yeah.  I was just thinking and you caught me by surprise.”  She cleared her throat.  “How are you?”

Esmeralda shrugged.  “Numb, I think.  If I think about this too long, I’m gonna get angry, and that’s not gonna do any of us any good at the moment.”  She shrugged again.  “Maybe when this is all over....”  She poured herself a cup of coffee despite Amber’s scowl and took a seat at the table.  “Let me see,” she demanded, tugging lightly on Amber’s injured hand.

Amber rolled her eyes but released her hand to Esmeralda’s tender care.  She waited until she was done, then gave Esmeralda a droll smile.  “Everything okay, doctor?”

Esmeralda cut her eyes at Amber, but couldn’t stop the slight twitch of her lip.  “I think you’ll be all right, Amber, but you should probably be a little more aware.  It’s not like I was being particularly quiet.”  She took a deep breath.  “What were you thinking about so hard anyway?”

Amber gave Esmeralda an unbelieving look, but when Esmeralda didn’t look away she shrugged.  “I was thinking about all the angles.”

Esmeralda cocked an eyebrow and Amber snickered at the familiar expression to keep the tears at bay.  “The angles?”

“Yeah.  Trying to see if there’s something we’ve missed because it’s obvious that we’re not getting all the information we should have.”  She looked down at her coffee, studying the steam as it rose.  “None of us are, Es.  Even Michael’s not in the loop on everything.”

“Maybe it’s a test,” Esmeralda offered with a vague hand motion.

“Maybe,” Amber agreed after she’d finally taken a sip of her coffee.  “But of what?  And whom?  And why?”  She sighed.  “I dunno, Es.  Seems like a selfish thing to do.”  She shook her head and took another swallow from her mug before she dragged her eyes up to meet Esmeralda’s.  “Is there anything you’d like to do today?  Or would you prefer to stay home and rest up for tomorrow?”

The sigh Esmeralda released was shaky, but her eyes were steady.  “I would prefer any number of things that just aren’t going to happen,” she replied wearily.  “But I think we will probably have visitors sooner or later.”  Amber’s eyebrows climbed into her hairline, and Esmeralda snickered just the tiniest bit.  “When I sent everyone home yesterday before you guys showed up, they said they’d be back today.  I doubt they’re going to wait too long to make good on that threat.”

Amber’s eyes widened.  “Is that what you see it as... a threat?”

Esmeralda rolled her eyes.  “It was a threat, Amber, no matter how politely worded it was.”  She lifted her mug to her lips and grimaced slightly as the bitter taste hit her tongue.  “Who’s watching?” she asked.

“Coral and Indi are still assigned to Brianna; Mal and Jade are trading off with Opal since Charisma and Kent are currently sharing household space.”  Esmeralda blinked and Amber nodded slowly.  “Yeah.  They decided it would just be easier on everyone if they were together for the next couple days.  I think Jade said something about them breaking the separation news to the family after the wake.”

Esmeralda shook her head.  “I know I should be glad that something positive is coming out of this whole fiasco.  But I can honestly say I just don’t care.  Don’t get me wrong,” she continued when Amber opened her mouth to speak.  “I do hope it works out well for them.  After all, we’ve invested a lot into this mission, and they deserve to find happiness together after all this time.  On the other hand – it’s cost me everything.  I just want it to be over now.”  Esmeralda took a deep breath and blinked rapidly to keep the tears from spilling.  Amber remained silent.  “I’m gonna go get cleaned up.”

Amber nodded. “I’ll wait down here until you’re done in case someone shows up while you’re gone.”

Esmeralda rose and put her half-full cup into the sink.  She passed behind Amber, squeezing her shoulder briefly before she disappeared back into her bedroom.  Amber watched her go and sighed, rubbing her eyes to rid them of the harsh stinging.  She couldn’t wait for this to be over.

************

Ruby wandered into the kitchen a few minutes later, stopping at the threshold when the sound of running water caught her attention.  Amber looked up and waited for Ruby’s eyes to find hers, then she motioned towards the coffee pot. 

“I think there’s enough for one more cup,” she offered.

Ruby nodded her thanks and crossed to the coffeemaker, pouring out a cup and starting a new pot.  She noticed the half-full cup in the sink and turned to look at Amber.

“How is she?” straight and to the point.  Amber shrugged.

“I’m not sure.  I’d almost call her unfeeling at this point except you and I both know the entire problem is she feels too much.”  A knock sounded on the door before Amber could elaborate and Amber motioned for Ruby to stay put.  “I’ll go,” she offered.  “Es is expecting them.”

A moment later and Amber returned with Charisma trailing behind her.  Ruby offered her a cup of coffee that was accepted, then they all took a seat at the table.  Before the silence could grow too awkward, Charisma cleared her throat to speak.

“How is she?” looking between Amber and Ruby.  Ruby gestured to Amber and Charisma focused her attention in that direction.

“She’s up,” glancing at the clock.  “She should be out here shortly.  Other than that....”  Amber shrugged.  It was hard to explain what Esmeralda was going through.  Not only had she lost her mate; she had lost the mate she’d had every expectation of sharing eternity with.

“And how are you?” Charisma asked compassionately.

“I’m fine,” Amber replied brusquely.  “Saphira was only my sister – she was EVERYTHING to Es.”

Charisma cleared her throat again.  “I can only imagine how devastated Es is because I have never seen two people as much a part of each other as they were; they had something amazing together.  But I know that if something like this happened to one of my brothers, I’d still feel the loss very sharply.  So please don’t feel you need to downplay your own loss in this situation.”  She hesitated, then took a deep breath to continue.  “I know we really don’t know one another, but I counted your sister as a friend and if you want to talk....”

Amber nodded rapidly.  “If you’ll excuse me,” rising from her seat, “I’ll go check on Es.”  She spun around and knocked on the door behind her before letting herself in.  Charisma turned to Ruby who patted her hand.

“Don’t worry about it, Sen... Charisma.  She’s trying to deal with something she never expected to.  I’m sure she’ll appreciate the offer once she has the chance to think about it.”

“It’s fine, Ruby,” Charisma offered with a wave.  “It’s not like we actually know one another. I just... feel so helpless.  I wish there was something I could do.”

Ruby stared into her coffee cup and shook her head.  “We’ll be there for them, Charisma – it’s all we can do... sad as that is to say.”

“Will it be enough, Ruby?”

This time Ruby shrugged.  “I don’t know,” she replied honestly, lifting the mug to her lips.  Before she could take a sip, there was another knock on the door and Ruby set her cup on the table and rose with a quiet excuse.  Charisma frowned as she glanced at her watch.  Surely her time wasn’t up already.  Then she heard two sets of steps headed towards the kitchen and turned to find Matilda walking in behind Ruby carrying a box.  Charisma immediately rose and took the box from Matilda when Esmeralda crossed the threshold into the kitchen.  Matilda opened her arms and Esmeralda stepped into her embrace though she made no effort to do more than give Matilda a polite hug.  Matilda frowned and released her, but before she could comment on Esmeralda’s lack of participation Charisma had maneuvered around her to offer Esmeralda the same.  After only a moment Charisma eased back as well, her expression confused.

“Es?” wondering where the grief-stricken woman of the day before had gone.  She almost preferred the outpouring of emotion – even crippling grief – to the apathy she and Matilda were facing now.

“Charisma,” Esmeralda answered softly.  “It’s nice of you to come.  You too, Matilda, though you needn’t have brought anything with you.  I’m sure we have plenty.”

Matilda cocked her head.  “Es?  Honey, I had to do something, and this is what I’m good at,” motioning to the food Ruby had emptied from the box.  “I promised Saphira....”

Esmeralda’s eyes blazed.  “You promised Saphira??  What the hell does that mean??” her profanity causing eyes to widen as much as her anger.  “She promised me forever!!”  She gulped in air and her eyes flashed fire.  “Promises are just empty words; they don’t mean anything!!”

“Honey....”

“NO!!”  Esmeralda closed her eyes; when she opened them, they were once more flat and gray.  “No, I appreciate that you feel some sort of obligation to be here, and you’re certainly welcome to stay.  But we’re not going to talk about Saphira... at all.”

“Es....”

“I mean it, Charisma.  As far as I’m concerned, we can sit quietly.  After all, silence is my new companion; I suppose I should get used to it.”

Matilda and Charisma exchanged glances, and without another word they took a seat at the table, hoping to think of something Esmeralda might be willing to talk about.  Unfortunately, with Saphira off limits as a topic, there wasn’t much they had in common to talk about and it didn’t take long for the weather to be exhausted. 

As the silence lengthened and became uncomfortable, Charisma looked between Ruby and Matilda.  “Matilda, Ruby - would you mind if Es and I excused ourselves for a few minutes?” Ruby and Matilda both answered in the negative, and Charisma rose, holding out her hand to Esmeralda.  Esmeralda studied her for a long moment, then accepted the proffered hand, allowing Charisma to pull her to her feet.  Together they walked out of the kitchen and into the living room, unaware of the drama already playing out in that room.

************

Amber had done as she’d said – she had checked on Esmeralda and let her know that Charisma had arrived and was waiting for her in the kitchen.  But when she left the bedroom, she’d gone out the hall door with the intent of going up the back stairs to her room.  Instead she’d run straight into Michael, and it was only his hand over her lips that kept her from crying out.  She glared and jerked her elbow out of his grasp, eyes widening and jaw dropping when she realized just who stood in front of her.

He held out his arms, wings spread wide behind him and she clasped his hand, pulled him into the living room and closed the door behind them.  Whatever had brought him here it was a good bet no one else was supposed to be aware of his angelic presence.

“Michael??  Is this the start of a coup or something??  I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to be here.”

“I’m pretty sure you’re right.”

“Then why...?  Why risk?  Weren’t you the one that told me...?”

“Yes,” he said with a long-suffering sigh.  “But this is important.”  He took a deep breath and met Amber’s eyes.  “Amber, it’s Saphira’s fault she died.”

Amber instantly frowned.  “Michael, Saphira’s death was an accident caused by a child.”

“The circumstances of her death may be accidental, but her death itself isn’t.”

“Michael, you’re not making any sense.”

Michael ran his hand through his hair and sighed deeply.  “Can we sit?  This may take a few minutes, and I feel like I’m running on empty.”  Amber took a good look at his face and nodded.  She hadn’t seen him this exhausted since Lucifer had been tossed.  Michael sighed again in relief as he sat, feeling his body relax a little. Amber sat down beside him and covered his hand with her own.

“Michael, what’s going on?”

“Do you remember when He cast Saphira and Esmeralda from Heaven?  Do you remember His conditions to allow them to come home again?”

“Of course – Saphira had to admit that her actions were wrong and she had to sincerely mean it,” Amber replied without hesitation.  Michael nodded but didn’t elaborate and Amber frowned again.  “Michael, what does that have to do with anything??”  Michael continued to remain silent and Amber gasped. “She didn’t!”

“From what I have been able to find out, Saphira went to the Father several months ago.”

“Then why...?”

Michael placed a finger over her lips and Amber quieted, though she gave him a look that should have turned him to cinder.  “Let me finish.  Apparently Saphira went to the Father and confessed her wrongdoing with the understanding that Esmeralda be healed from whatever was plaguing her.  She was dying, Amber.”  Amber parted her lips and Michael glared.  Amber sighed and crossed her arms over her chest, motioning for him to get on with it.  “In asking for forgiveness, Saphira’s punishment was over.  But Es still has a job to finish.”

She waited, and when he didn’t continue, she jumped from the couch.  “Are you telling me Saphira has been called back home?  That her death is a hoax??”

Michael shook his head.  “I don’t know where Saphira is.  There’s no trace of her in Heaven, Hell or on Earth.  It’s like she no longer exists.”

“This just gets better and better,” Amber mumbled.  “Michael, do you understand how detrimental Saphira’s death has been to Es?  She’s dying, Michael... AGAIN.  Whatever bargain Saphira made was useless, because this is killing Es just as surely as before.”  She dropped her head into her hands and propped her elbows on her knees.   “Even if she survives long enough to finish this assignment, she’s not going to live... she’s going to exist.  And I wouldn’t put odds on her existing much beyond the conclusion of the mission.  Es is broken, Michael, and if she finds out that Saphira’s actions are what caused this....”  Amber let her thoughts trail off and silence reigned for several moments.  “Do you think Saphira knew about this?  Do you think she expected this outcome when she capitulated?”

Michael shook his head.  “I can’t believe she did, Amber.  For as many volatile run-ins as we’ve had, she’s never neglected to do what it took to take care of Es.”

Amber nodded, knowing it for the truth.  Before she could reply she heard Charisma and Esmeralda just outside the doors.  Taking Michael’s hand, she closed her eyes, and with that blink they disappeared upstairs to her room.

************

Charisma had held her tongue, wanting to speak to Esmeralda privately.  Just as they reached the doors to the living room the phone rang, and Esmeralda excused herself to answer it.  In a moment she was back.

“I’m sorry, Charisma.  That was the funeral home.  I need to go, but if you’d like to wait here....”

“Let me take you, Es.  We can wait to talk until we return if you’d be more comfortable, but I have my car here.  I would feel better if you’d let me take you.  Don’t say no,” she added when it looked as if Esmeralda was going to refuse.  “I can go in with you or I can wait in the car; just let me get you there and back safely.”

Esmeralda shook her head, but didn’t object aloud; she merely went to the closet to don her coat.  Charisma followed suit and in minutes, they were headed for the funeral home.

The ride was quiet as Charisma had promised and when they arrived, Esmeralda turned to face her.  “Thank you, Charisma.  If you don’t mind...?”

“I’ll be right here when you get out,” Charisma promised, cupping Esmeralda’s face and brushing a kiss over her forehead.  Esmeralda nodded and slipped from the car like a ghost, and Charisma pulled her phone out to let the others know where they had gone, then she settled in to wait.

************

She gave her name to the receptionist, and the woman immediately put a call in to the director.  It only took a few seconds, and he was cradling Esmeralda’s small hands between his much larger ones.  “I’m so sorry for your loss,” he offered, and Esmeralda acknowledged the platitude with a nod.  She didn’t want his words – they meant nothing to her.  Seeing her reaction, the director cleared his throat and continued speaking.  “Saphira has been prepared for cremation; I thought you might want an opportunity to say your final goodbye.”

He winced when her hands tightened painfully around his, and he strained to hear her reply.  “Thank you,” she replied in a whisper.  He nodded and released her hands to motion towards a short hallway to one side of the chapel.

“This way, please.”  Esmeralda walked beside him and he stopped at a thick wooden door and opened it.  “Take all the time you need, Esmeralda.  Just let Ms Ross know when you’re ready to leave.”

“Thank you, Mr. Prescott.”  The man watched her a moment longer, but she wasn’t looking at him and he left quietly.  Esmeralda kept her eyes focused on the still face in the wooden casket, unaware of the steps that brought her to Saphira’s side.

For several long moments she stared as though memorizing Saphira’s features.  Finally she raised her hands to gently touch Saphira’s cold skin, shivering instinctively, but refusing to remove her hands from Saphira’s face.  Only when the cold began to seep into her bones did Esmeralda shift her hands, brushing the dark hair from Saphira’s face then tucking her hands into her coat pockets once more.

“I’m not sure what to say, Saphira.  We were never supposed to be here.  And I really don’t think dreams and wishful thinking will bring you back to me.”  She sighed, her breath shuddering as she struggled to keep the tears from falling again.  “I hope the Father forgave you, Phira – I hope you’ll find peace in whatever afterlife fallen Angels get.  I love you, Phira.”

Esmeralda stared a moment longer, hoping that her words would engender a response... just like they always had between them from the moment they’d recognized their bond in their youth.  When Saphira remained still and silent, Esmeralda turned on her heel and walked out without a backwards glance.


Chapter XCVIII

“Everything all right?” Charisma asked when Esmeralda climbed back in her SUV.  “I mean besides....”

“About like you’d expect,” Esmeralda answered wearily.  “Thank you for the ride, Charisma.”

“Thank you for letting me help, Es.  I know it’s not much, but I can’t not try to do something,” glancing over to offer Esmeralda a smile, only to find her focus was completely taken by something outside the window.  “Es?”

Esmeralda didn’t move her gaze, but she responded, “What did you want to talk about, Charisma?”

“Huh?” trying to catch up to Esmeralda’s thought process.  “Oh!” just as Esmeralda opened her mouth to reply.  “You mean when I pulled you away from Matilda and Ruby?” seeing Esmeralda nod.  “I was wondering,” feeling herself blush.  “Why did you say what you did yesterday to Brianna and me?  How did you know?”

“Which do you want to know?” Esmeralda asked, her eyes never moving from the widow.

“I can’t know both?” receiving silence as an answer.  Charisma sighed.  “All right... why?”

“Because you’re both acting like jackasses and I’m tired of it.”

Charisma pulled to the side of the road and turned the vehicle off.  “Excuse me?” more than a little put out with Esmeralda’s bluntness.  She was a United States Senator – no one spoke to her with such total disregard of who she was... not even her family.

Esmeralda never moved her eyes from whatever they were focused on beyond her sight.  “What part do you need me to explain to you, Charisma?”  Charisma didn’t respond and Esmeralda sighed.  “I’m not trying to disrespect you, Senator Tagherty.  You asked why; I gave you the truth.  If you’re completely honest with yourself, you’ll see that I’m right.”

Charisma sighed loudly and crossed her arms over her chest.  “How did you know?” she finally asked, not refuting Esmeralda’s previous words but unwilling to acknowledge the truth of them of the either.  “And why do you care... really?”  Esmeralda was quiet so long, Charisma sighed again.  “Es?  Please?”

“I know because you both talk to me.  You talk to me when you should be talking to each other.”  She grew quiet again, but this time Charisma waited, instinctively understanding that whatever Esmeralda had to share was harder because it probably involved Saphira in some way. After a bit Esmeralda took a deep breath and continued, though her voice was so low Charisma was forced to concentrate to understand her words.  “I told you our story – Saphira’s and mine,” angling her head to so she could see Charisma’s agreement.  “Your story is similar to ours – including your reactions to the pain you’re going through  It kills me that you’re choosing to be miserable.”

“Do you understand what you’re asking us to risk?”

“Do you understand the reward is worth the risk?”

“You’re assuming everything’s just going to work out... like it was some kind of freaking faery tale that always has a happy ending!”

“And you’re so afraid to be happy that you won’t even try!”

There was no more conversation the remainder of the ride back to Esmeralda’s.

************

Charisma dropped Esmeralda at home, innately understanding that a little space would be appreciated and still prickly over Esmeralda’s accusations.  Besides, it wasn’t like there wouldn’t be a steady influx of visitors during the day; everyone had sat down together the evening before and worked out a schedule between them to ensure that Esmeralda would have a stream of company throughout the day.  So Charisma waited for Esmeralda to close the door behind her after she entered the house, then turned her vehicle towards her home, knowing no one was expecting her back so early, but unable to stay any longer with Esmeralda’s words echoing in her ears.

Esmeralda wasn’t surprised to find Matilda and Ruby still ensconced in the kitchen when she finally made her way into the room, but she was a bit startled by Amber’s presence.  Not that Amber didn’t have every right to be there or that Esmeralda didn’t appreciate it more than she could say, but Amber tended to shy away from interacting with mortals on the Earthly plane.  She said it messed with her Guardian mojo, but Esmeralda knew it had more to do with making their punishment too real. 

So she smiled slightly when she saw Amber sitting at the table, making small talk with Ruby and Matilda.  She walked up behind her and slipped her arms around Amber’s neck, whispering “Thank you,” softly into her ear.  Amber pulled away just enough to look into Esmeralda’s eyes, gently cupping her cheek and studying the myriad of emotions swirling through the flat gray. 

“Everything okay?” she asked, knowing Esmeralda would understand what she was really asking.  Nothing was even close to okay in their lives anymore, but Amber needed to know if something more had happened or if Esmeralda had somehow overheard Michael’s news.  Frankly Amber didn’t want to be anywhere near ground zero when Esmeralda made that particular discovery.  No one and nothing would be safe.

“Mr. Prescott called.  Charisma drove me over to say goodbye,” Esmeralda answered without emotion as she slipped into her chair at the head of the table.  Amber’s brow furrowed.

“Why didn’t you say something, Es?  I’d have gone with you.”

“I know, Amber, but I needed to do this by myself.  I needed to say goodbye without an audience.”

“Charisma didn’t go in with you?” Matilda queried.

Esmeralda shook her head.  “I asked her to wait in her truck.”

“Speaking of... where is the good Senator?”

Esmeralda shrugged, not willing to disclose in front of Matilda the words she and Charisma had exchanged.  “I dunno – to work, I guess.  The government doesn’t stop just because my world came to an end, Amber.” 

Ruby held up a hand before Amber could open her lips.  “I’ll bet she headed home so someone else could visit,” giving Amber a significant glance, implying knowledge of fact.  “People were tripping over one another here yesterday, and she came by herself this morning.  I wouldn’t be surprised if we had a steady trickle of visitors all day.”

As if to confirm her words there was a quiet knock on the front door, and Ruby excused herself to answer it.  Matilda turned her attention to Esmeralda.  “I know you don’t want to talk about Saphira and I’m going to respect that; but I would like to stay a while longer.”

Esmeralda gave Matilda a sad smile.  “Matilda, you’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like to.”

“You realize I’m gonna feed you, right?”

Esmeralda chuckled lightly.  “I wouldn’t expect anything less of you, Matilda.  You’ve been feeding me almost since we met.”

“Well, I have to do something, honey.  You were so thin....”  She gave Esmeralda the once-over even though half of her body was hidden by the table at which she was seated.  Matilda cocked an eyebrow.  “You still are, despite my best efforts, but we’ll just keep working at it,” she continued without giving Esmeralda a chance to protest.  “Joe will be here around lunchtime with a pot roast, and I expect you to make a good effort,” she instructed.

Before Esmeralda could response, Patrick crossed the threshold and walked directly to Esmeralda, kneeling in front of her and taking her hands in his.  He didn’t speak, having been instructed by Ruby about Saphira being off-limits.  Instead he simply gazed at her, conveying all the love and sorrow he felt.   Esmeralda loosened a hand and cupped his cheek, giving him a small smile.

“Thank you, Patrick,” she offered softly.

He nodded.  “Anything we can do to help,” he stated unequivocally.  He squeezed the hand he still held before releasing it.  Then he stood and took a seat between Esmeralda and Amber and began to fill her in on when the boys and their families would be arriving in town.

Before he was done there was another knock on the front door, and once more Ruby excused herself to answer it.  And so it went throughout the day.  As she had predicted, there was a steady stream of visitors that came to offer their condolences, and though no one stayed long Esmeralda was exhausted by the time the last one was ushered out hours later.

Amber had long since given up and Esmeralda had nodded her blessing.  She understood only too well how overwhelmed Amber felt having to maintain her mortal, human state for so long... especially around so many Earth-born humans.

Ruby, on the other hand, had been a rock.  She’d been in the business for longer than Esmeralda, and was well used to dealing with all types of humanity while in her corporeal form.  Still she was more than a little happy to be ushering Okasa out and locking the door behind her.  She returned to the kitchen to find Esmeralda with her head resting on the arms she’d folded on top of the table.

“Es?  Sweetheart?” frowning when Esmeralda visibly flinched.

“Please don’t call me that, Ruby,” she asked in a hushed tone.  “It hurts.”

“Oh Es...” Ruby said, shaking her head.  “I’m so sorry.  I didn’t even think....”

Esmeralda gave her a weak smile.  “It’s okay, Ruby.  I didn’t either until I heard it.”  She sat up slightly and ran her hands through messy hair.  “I’m so tired, Ruby, and we haven’t even gotten to the hard part yet.”

“I know, Es, but we’ll all be here for you, and we’ll support you as long as you need us,” leaving unspoken the fact that they could already see Esmeralda withering away from them.  “I wonder where Brianna was?” she mentioned, changing the subject.

“Kay said something about her trying to put out some kind of fire on the Hill.  I think she’s still angry because I called her and Charisma out yesterday,” Esmeralda added casually.

“So you think Kay was lying?”

“Not at all.  I’m sure that’s what Brianna told her.  Whether Brianna was telling Kay the truth, though....”  Esmeralda shrugged.  “I’m sure if something really did go down on Capitol Hill we’ll hear about it in the news... or one of the others will tell us about it,” she added, scrubbing her face with hands that ached from the tension in them.  “Where is everyone, by the way?  I know they’re not all watching now.”

“Mal is watching Charisma and Kent, and Jade is watching Brianna.  Mal is going to watch through the night and Coral will be taking her regular shift with Brianna.  Opal and Indi will be with us tomorrow.  After that...?  It will depend on our needs.”

Ruby watched as Esmeralda ran her hands over her face again, and reached out a tentative hand to offer support.  “Es, why don’t you go on to bed?  It’s already been such a long day, and tomorrow is going to be another just like it.”

“Only worse,” Esmeralda muttered.  Ruby nodded her agreement.

“Only worse.  Jade will be in soon, and we’ll know if Brianna was telling Kay the truth or if she’s still put out with you.  But somehow, I don’t think that would have kept her away from you.  She’s never struck me as petty like that.”

Esmeralda sighed.  “Me either, but you didn’t see how angry she was yesterday.  It may have been too much.”  She pushed her hair from her face once more, and leaned her shaking arms on the table to help her to rise from her chair.  When she was certain that the floor was going to remain beneath her like it was supposed to, she turned to Ruby.  “You’ll let me know...?”

“If it’s something important, Es, you’ll be the first.  But I’m inclined to let you sleep.  You need the rest, and I don’t think anything is gonna happen between them tonight or tomorrow at any rate.  They love and respect you too much for that.  However,” Ruby hastened on before Esmeralda could speak, “if it’s important, I’ll wake you, all right?  Trust me... I’ve been doing this a long time, Kiddo.”

That address got Ruby the barest sliver of a smile, but it was enough for her to feel a measure of success.  She gave Esmeralda a tiny smirk in return and offered her an arm of support.  Esmeralda grabbed it and squeezed lightly, then leaned forward and brushed a light kiss over Ruby’s cheek.

“Thanks, Ruby.  I don’t know what I’d do without you.” 

Ruby patted Esmeralda’s hand and opened the door to the bedroom before nudging Esmeralda inside.  No words were necessary between them, and Esmeralda was tucked into bed in minutes.  Ruby swept the blonde hair off Esmeralda’s face, carding her hands through it gently in an effort to relax the tension she could see and feel.  Only when Esmeralda’s eyes remained closed and her breathing evened out did Ruby halt her ministrations and return to the kitchen.  She hoped Jade would report in soon... with news.

************

Brianna had spent the day at the office - part of it anyway – but it wasn’t for something that was going to make the news or be read about in the papers.  And if Laura Maxwell had her way, none of what had transpired would ever see the light of day.

Brianna’s phone had rung early – not that it was an issue.  She’d been up for a while thinking about a lot of things. Esmeralda’s words rolled round and round again in her head until Brianna had decided that sleep was an elusive commodity she wasn’t going to see that night.  Instead she slid from the bed she was sharing with Kay and pulled on her thick robe before leaving the room.  Once the door was closed behind her, Brianna moved straight to the kitchen and heated up water for tea, letting it steep a good long time before she took it to the living room.

She couldn’t have said how long she sat there curled under the afghan her grandmother had made staring into the flames made possible by the gas fireplace when she felt Kay tugging at a corner of the cover.  Without a word Brianna opened the blanket and Kay crawled in beside her and waited for Brianna to snuggle into her for warmth.  After a long moment they both sighed and Kay gently hugged Brianna to her.

“You all right?” she asked sleepily.  “I know you haven’t actually slept yet.”

Brianna shrugged.  “I keep thinking about what Es said.  Part of me is angry and part of me is sad and a little of me is even afraid.”  She stopped and Kay just waited.  “But the biggest part of me just hurts, Kay.”

“Why?”  Brianna blinked and turned her head to look at Kay disbelievingly.  Kay just arched an eyebrow.  “It’s a legitimate question Bri.  Why do you feel the way you feel?”

“I’m angry....”  Brianna took a deep breath, closing her eyes as she released it slowly, then breathed in again slowly as she opened her eyes and met Kay’s.  “I’m angry because she called me out in front of Charisma and because she was right.  I’m sad because seeing Esmeralda like this... Kay, I’ve seen death – you know that.  I’ve seen what happens when half of a couple is gone.  I’m sad because I know what this means for Es even if it doesn’t kill her.  She’ll always been lonely even when she’s surrounded by people she loves.”  Brianna paused and Kay just waited, knowing there was more.  “I’m afraid because she was right, Kay; Es was right.  I’m furious at Charisma, and I don’t know if I can get past that.  Sometimes I’m not sure I even want to try anymore.”  Kay nodded but she didn’t speak, and Brianna tilted her head in question.  “No comment?”

“They’re your feelings, Bri.  What would you like me to say?”  Kay held Brianna’s gaze, and after a moment Brianna just shook her head.  “Tell me the rest, Bri.”

“I hurt, Kay – I’ve hurt for a very long time, but I’ve always been able to keep it in the background, you know?  Something I was aware of, but not really conscious of, if that makes any sense.  Like I knew there was always a place that belonged to Charisma, but as long as we were out of each other’s lives it was just a dull ache; something I didn’t notice unless it got poked.”

“And now?”

“Now it’s harsh and burning and... I don’t know how to describe it, Kay.  It just hurts.”  She laughed grimly.  “Funny, huh?  A writer with no words.”

Kay cupped Brianna’s face tenderly.  “I have never thought it funny to see you in pain.”

Brianna closed her eyes and leaned into the touch; she sighed softly.  “What am I going to do, Kay?  Everything I’ve tried has been an abject failure.  I can’t ignore her anymore; I can’t just be friends; I refuse to be the other woman.  What’s left?”

“Maybe you should try talking together.”

Brianna’s eyebrows flew into her hairline.  “Are you kidding me?!?  That’s it??  That’s all you’ve got?”

Kay’s brown eyes flashed fire and Brianna’s widened in response.  “Brianna, like it or not, you’ve been all over the place about her... with her... since you arrived here.  You need to sit down and decide what’s best for you.”  Kay sighed and looked at the fire that still crackled merrily along.  “As I see it, you’ve got two basic choices.  You either sit down together and talk this out from the beginning until you reach a resolution you both want and can live with....”

“Or?” when the pause went on too long.

“Or you call Michael and tell him to appoint someone else in your place and you walk out of her life – out of their lives – forever.”  Kay took another deep breath.  “It’s not fair to either of you otherwise, and you can’t keep living like this – neither of you can.  I know that you’ve lived with this pain for a long time, Lover – it’s time to let it go.”

Brianna smiled sadly.  “Been a long time since you called me that.”

“Been a long time since we’ve been that, but I do still love you, Bri.  A part of me always will, remember?”  She yawned and stretched, then stood so she could stretch again.  Then she turned and tucked the afghan around Brianna’s shoulders once more.  “I’m going back to bed.  It’s still dark out, and I need all the sleep I can get before my brood shows up this morning.”

“Thanks, Kay,” Brianna whispered as Kay walked around the couch.  Kay leaned down and brushed a kiss over the top of Brianna’s head. 

“Anytime, Sweetie.  I’ll even give you the family discount,” she added with a smirk.  Brianna snorted.

“Good thing – it’s the only way I can afford you.”  Kay chuckled and continued her trek back to the bedroom, closing the door but not shutting it completely.  Brianna remained on the couch though her thoughts were a million miles away.  It was only when her phone rang a couple hours later that she was pulled from her brown study, only to frown when she saw the name on her screen

What on Earth could Laura Maxwell want with her at six o’clock in the morning??


Chapter XCIX

Brianna had glared at her phone once the call was over as if it had instigated the entire fiasco she could feel brewing like a hurricane.  Instead of tossing it into the nearest wall, however, Brianna merely turned it off and placed in on the nearby table.  Then she stretched out, enjoying the sensation of relaxation as it stole over the length of her body.  She closed her eyes, but Laura Maxwell’s words continued to echo in her mind until Brianna was growling out loud.

“Who does that bitch think she is?”

“Which bitch?” Kay asked through a yawn.  “And why the hell is the phone ringing at six a.m.?”  Brianna sat up, smiling sympathetically at the petulant expression Kay was giving her as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes.  Brianna extended her arm and Kay sat down next to her, pulling the afghan around her shoulders to help retain the warmth Brianna had created.

“Laura Maxwell.”

Kay waited patiently, but when all Brianna did was frown, she poked her in the ribs.  Brianna squealed and glared at her, but Kay simply returned the glare and shrugged her shoulders.  Brianna huffed.

“The phone ringing was Laura Maxwell.  It seems she has decided she has an issue with me after all.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m not sure I do yet either,” Brianna stated.  “We don’t serve on any committees together so I’ve only met the woman once that wasn’t in passing, and she didn’t appear to have a problem with me then.  But if she feels the need to call me before God and the birds are awake for the day, I’d be willing to wager she’s found something to bitch at me about... especially since she demanded my presence in her office this morning.”

“She DEMANDED?”

Brianna snorted.  “Oh yes – it was definitely an order.  I think she’s under the impression that she’s a general in the great war of life, and we are just lowly foot soldiers awaiting her bidding.”

“So are you going to acquiesce to her demand?”

“I am going to meet with her at the time I told her I was available to be there, but only because I am going to explain a few things to her.”

Kay laughed.  “I’d love to be able to sit in on that meeting.  What time is it scheduled?”

“This morning at eleven.  She wanted to meet me at eight; I refused.  I want to be here to at least say hi to your family when they arrive, and I’ve got a couple things to take care of before I’m supposed to be at Es’.”

“Are you still planning to go?”  Briana looked at Kay like she’d grown a second head.  “You said last night....”

“Kay, I would never let something like Es’ honesty keep me from standing by her as her friend at a time like this... especially after what she and Saphira did for me when I first got here.”  She sighed.  “Either way, I’d rather she be honest... however embarrassing and painful it is; there is usually less drama in the end.  So unless Laura Maxwell keeps me tied up for several hours talking about God knows what in this stinking town, I’ll be at Es’ this afternoon.”

“You don’t know what she wants?”

“She refused to say over the phone.  But I’ll give you a guess.”

“Charisma?”

“That’s my thought.”

************

It was still early when Lee and the kids arrived in town, but Brianna and Kay were waiting for them in the lobby of the hotel they were staying at for the remainder of their time in Washington.  After exchanging hugs and salutations, they made their way upstairs to the rooms Kay had already secured for them.  The kids followed Kay directly to their room to take care of their things and Lee turned a judicious eye towards Brianna as they walked into the second room.  He immediately began to unpack.

“Who pissed you off so early?” he asked without a hint of apology in his voice for either his nosiness or his tone as he hung his suit in the closet.  Brianna just smirked.

“That obvious?”

Lee snickered.  “Bri, I’ve known you long enough to see through the political façade bullshit.”  He stared at her a long moment.  “So the question remains – who pissed you off so early?”

Brianna shook her head.  “Ask me later.  Then I’ll know if I have more reason to be angry than simply being woken up before daybreak this morning.”

Lee winced.  “Ouch.”  He turned to Kay as she crossed the threshold into their room.  “How’s Es?”

Kay shook her head.  “I don’t know, honestly.  She seems to accept what’s happened, but there is something in her eyes....  It’s….”  She shook her head again.  “I don’t know,” she repeated.

“Are we going to see her today?  Or is there some sort of viewing...?”

Kay shook her head.  “No viewing - Saphira is supposed to be cremated today.  The service is tomorrow morning at ten, and then there will be a gathering at Charisma’s for folks to offer their condolences.”  She glanced at her watch.  “Charisma should be with Es right now; we set up a schedule last night so someone would be with her at all times today.  You’re welcome to go with me if you’d like.”  Kay turned her attention to Brianna.  “Are the boys going?”  Brianna shrugged and Kay shrugged back before looking back at Lee.  “It’s up to you, Sweetie.  Whatever you’re most comfortable with.”

Lee nodded.  It wasn’t like he knew Esmeralda well.  “Let’s just play it by ear.  A lot depends on the kids.”

“I’ll try to get back here to watch them if you want to go, Lee,” Brianna offered as she glanced at her watch.  “I need to get going though.  I’ve got some things I need to do before it’s my turn to stay with Es, and some of them can’t wait apparently,” she added with a growl.  Lee’s eyes widened and he cocked a brow at Kay who simply shook her head at him.  He nodded his understanding and turned back to Brianna as she picked up her purse.  “You have my number if you need me,” she reminded them.

“You have mine as well,” Kay replied, knowing Brianna understood what she was saying.

“Yes, thank God.  Because I’m pretty sure killing stupid people is still considered murder and I really don’t look good in orange,” Brianna added with a wry grin.  She stepped forward and claimed a hug.  “Thank you, Kay.  You don’t know....”

“Yes, I do.  Give me a call later just to let me know how things go.  We can talk about it or not as you feel like it.”

Brianna kissed her cheek.  “Thanks,” she whispered again as she pulled back from their embrace.  Then she turned to Lee and opened her arms.  Without a word he lifted her up and squeezed her tightly but with a gentleness belied by his frame.  “Thank you for sharing her, Lee,” kissing him as well.

He didn’t answer except to kiss her back, then he gently put her on her feet.  “I want the whole story later,” he instructed.  Brianna gave him a shaky smile.

“As soon as I can,” she promised.  Then she called out to the other room.  “I need some goodbye hugs,” causing a commotion of stomping feet as the kids ran as a group to bury her in hugs and kisses.  Then Brianna was out the door and headed to the Mall to meet her first appointment of the day.

************

Charisma was still seething over Esmeralda’s words as she pulled back into the garage of her home.  But if she was completely honest, she wasn’t as angry at Esmeralda as she was at herself.  Everything Esmeralda had said – had *accused* her of – was completely true, and that rankled as much as being called out on her behavior.  She shut off the SUV and leaned her head on the steering wheel and closed her eyes.  The rapping on the window made her jump, and Charisma turned to glare at the disturbance.  Kent gazed back at her with concern.  She sighed and rolled down the window.

“You all right?”

She thought about the myriad of replies she could give to that question and shrugged.  “I will be,” she finally offered.  “What’s up?”

“That’s what I was going to ask.  You’re back early, and you’ve been sitting here for almost ten minutes.”

Charisma shook her head.  “I’m trying to figure out if I’m the windshield or the bug.”

Kent’s eyes went into his hairline.  “It’s kind of early to be having that kind of a day.”

Charisma smirked.  “I know,” opening the door as she rolled up the window.  Kent stepped back to allow her to exit the vehicle.  “And yet all indications are it’s going to be a bug kind of day.”

Kent winced.  “Ow.  Oh, did you turn your cell phone off?”

Charisma slumped.  “Yes.  I turned it off when I got to Es’.  I guess I forgot to turn it back on.  Why?”

“Laura Maxwell’s been trying to reach you for the last couple hours.  She said it wasn’t an emergency, and she refused to leave a message other than that she called, but the phone was ringing every twenty minutes like clockwork.  If it wasn’t for the fact that your brothers were coming into town today, I would have unplugged it.”

Charisma frowned.  “Was she rude?”

“Not really rude, per se... but definitely annoying.  I realize you need her backing if you want to make a run for the White House, but her people skills leave a lot to be desired.”

“You do understand she’s one of the most powerful women in America right now?” Charisma asked as she headed towards the house.

“You do understand that doesn’t make her any less annoying.”

Charisma chuckled and Kent smirked.  “It probably makes her moreso.”

“Well, whatever – please call her back before you do whatever else is on your schedule today.  She already woke Adam up early so she’s not among my favorite people at the moment.”

“Where is he now?” Charisma asked as she crossed to the coffee machine.

“In the family room with Okasa.  She’s going to keep an eye on him for a little while and then try to put him down for a nap before his cousins arrive.”

“Are you going somewhere?”

“Yes.  I have an appointment.  Bad timing I know, but it couldn’t be helped.  I’m going to go straight to Es’ from there.”

Charisma nodded slowly, hoping Kent would elaborate.  When he didn’t, she sighed silently and pulled the phone from her purse.  “Well, I’ve turned the phone back on if anything comes up.”

“I will.  Go take care of your business; I’ll be back later.” He headed back towards the garage, then faced Charisma again as she pulled the fresh coffee from its spot.  “Is there anything you need me to pick up on the way back?”

Charisma sipped slowly, letting the air cool her tongue as she savored the taste.  “Call me when you leave Es’ house.  We’ll see who’s here and what’s going on.”

“All right,” Kent nodded.  “Now go call that infernal woman before I have to take out a restraining order,” he said with a grin.  “Oh!  And make sure you call her private line – she was adamant about that.”  Charisma just stuck out her tongue and waved him off.  She waited for Kent to crank the SUV before she headed to her home office, determined to discover what Laura Maxwell needed from her.

************

“Where have you been??” Laura practically screeched in Charisma’s ear as soon as she picked up the call.  “I’ve been trying to reach you all morning!”

“I heard,” Charisma replied drolly.  “Did we declare war somewhere?”

“No... why would you...?”

“Is the threat of nuclear destruction any greater than it normally is?”

“No,” sounding a little more impatient.

“Is there a crisis that has shifted us into a Def-Con one status?”

“Well, no, but....”

“Then whatever you’re calling about could have waited until a later hour, Laura.”

“Even if it’s going to affect your Presidential campaign?”  Dead silence, and Charisma could hear Laura’s smirk in her tone when she spoke again.  “That’s what I thought.”

Charisma pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger as she blew out a frustrated breath.  “Laura, I have a friend who passed away and left a distraught wife behind, and you woke up my son with your incessant phone calls this morning.  I can honestly say that any type of campaign is pretty much the last thing on my mind right now.”

“I heard about the custodian’s... partner,” Laura enunciated with a hint of hesitancy.  “I understand it was unexpected, but we can’t let it derail years of work and planning.”

“Laura, if taking a couple of days to take care of a friend in her time of need is enough to wipe out all the work I’ve done and overturn the years of time and effort I have put in serving the constituents of my state, there isn’t any amount of power or influence that will make a difference in my campaign for the Presidency.”

“Charisma, please don’t be stupid.  This isn’t about you being friends with a custodian.  On the contrary, that is something we could easily spin....”

“NO!!”  The word wasn’t shouted, but the whisper was biting enough to cause complete silence for thirty full seconds.  Charisma took a deep breath.  “No, Laura.  This is not something we’re going to spin; this isn’t something that is going to be brought up at all.  Are we clear?”

“All right, Charisma,” Laura replied calmly.  “I never said we were going to; I simply said that we could.  However, that is not the reason I’ve been trying to reach you this morning.”

“Which is...?”

“Your rather innocuous announcement of your separation from Kent is stirring up talk and speculation.  We need to get out there and be aggressive about this, Charisma.”

“Why?”

“What?”

“Why, Laura?  What exactly do you expect me to say that I haven’t already said?  Kent and I have amicably separated by mutual agreement.”

“Is that the only reason, Charisma?  Are you certain there isn’t more to this than an amicable separation?”

Charisma frowned and her voice took on a sharper tone.  “What are you implying, Laura?”

“Nothing, Charisma.  I’m asking a question.”

Charisma frowned and bit her lip.  “Laura, Kent and I did agree to separate and we have done so without losing the friendship we’ve always had.  I’m not going to say anything more than that.  I refuse to share what are private matters between my husband and myself.  And I’m not going to allow Kent to accept sole blame for this situation because it’s not his fault.”  She paused a moment.  “It’s no one’s fault, Laura.  It’s just something that happened.”

Laura blew out a frustrated breath.  She knew there was a lot more to this story than Charisma was telling her, but she also understood they had hit an impasse.  Charisma wasn’t going to tell her anything more than she had already shared.  It was fortunate for Laura Maxwell that she had long ago learned to plan for any number of contingencies.  She felt positive she would get a better result from the appointment she had scheduled with Brianna Walker.  Some days it paid to keep a private investigator on your personal payroll.

“All right, Charisma,” Laura acquiesced quietly.  “You know I’m just looking out for your best interests here, right?  We can’t have anything coming back to bite us in the ass about this later.”

“I understand you’re doing what you think is best, Laura.  But I refuse to deal with any of this until after the service and the wake tomorrow.  If it can’t wait until Monday, I’ll just have to deal with the fallout as it happens.”

“I think we can probably release a statement to buy us some time until then, Charisma, but you’re going to have to meet with me so we can release a statement to the press as soon as possible.  We’ve worked too hard to get to this point just to let it go due to a lack of diligence on our part.  There are too many people counting on us to make this happen.”

“I know, Laura... I know.  But it’s going to have to wait until after tomorrow.”

“I understand, Charisma.  Oh,” Laura added quickly, “I don’t really understand why you feel this is more important, but I get that you do.  So let’s plan to get together first thing Monday morning, and we’ll work up what we need for a press conference.”

Charisma sighed.  “Fine.  That sounds reasonable.  I’m going to go check on my son.”

“About that – I’m sorry for waking him up.  I didn’t even consider the fact that he would be home sleeping.”

“Fortunately he’s resilient, Laura.  He won’t even remember it by the time his cousins arrive.  I’ll talk to you Monday.”

“Goodbye, Charisma.”

Charisma hung up the phone and sat at the desk for a long moment staring at it before heading out of her office and towards the family room to see Adam.

************

Kent parked the SUV in Charisma’s reserved spot, locking it securely then slid into his jacket.  The wind that blew across him as he stepped out into the open was cold and he spared a moment to shiver as he searched for his appointment.  When he found what he was looking for exactly where he expected her, Kent strode forward without hesitation.  He reached the bench in front of the National Gallery quickly and gestured to the empty space. 

“May I join you or would you prefer to walk?”

Brianna looked up and nodded towards the seat.  Kent sat down and clasped his hands between his knees.  Then he took a deep breath, and started to speak.


Chapter C

“Charisma and I go back a long time,” he began quietly, “though not as far as the two of you.  We met when she was still in the House so probably three or four years after you....”  He felt her nod her understanding and he cleared his throat.  “It was casual at first... our acquaintanceship, I mean.  We were in some of the same circles because of some of our shared charity interests so we’d see one another at various dinners and fundraisers and we’d share a bit of casual conversation.  But that was the extent of our contact for the first couple years we knew one another.”  Kent spared a moment to look at Brianna, but she didn’t return his gaze and she didn’t speak so he breathed out slowly and resumed his narrative.  “It wasn’t until after Charisma became a Senator that things changed between us, and I have to admit to being a little surprised by it all.  Don’t get me wrong - we had developed a good, solid friendship by that point.  We could talk to each other about practically everything, and we were pretty honest about things.”  He paused and shook his head.  “Most things, anyway.”  Kent turned and faced Brianna, waiting for her to turn and meet his eyes.  “I want you to understand that I didn’t know about you, Brianna.  If I had....”

She smiled sadly at him.  “If you had, it wouldn’t have made a difference, Kent.”

“I’m not so sure about that.”

“I am.  Besides, whatever else has happened, you got Adam out of your union with Charisma and even I can’t fault either of you for that.  He’s a great kid.”

Kent chuckled.  “He’s a handful all right.  He’s also the reason we decided to get married.”

“I don’t understand.  I thought you got married for Charisma’s image.”

“We got married because we both wanted a child, and for Charisma’s sake we needed to be married to share that.  We cared about one another... still do, actually – but we never loved one another passionately or completely.  We loved each other without ever actually being in love.”  He sighed.  “It was a mutually satisfying arrangement whose time is over.”

“How can you say that?  You still have a child to raise together, and if Charisma wants to make a bid for the White House....”

“Brianna, we can still raise a child together without being married.”

“Kent, I’m going to ask you something, and I want you to be honest with me.”  Kent nodded and Brianna returned it before looking back over the Mall.  “If I hadn’t come back into Charisma’s life... however peripherally... would you and Charisma have separated?”

Kent offered her a small smile.  “Brianna, we were separated long before you came back into her life.  We’ve been living different lives for most of the time we’ve known one another.  Except for a few months when we first married, Charisma and I have been roommates more than husband and wife.”

“Why are you telling me all this?”

Kent gave her an embarrassed smile, then dropped his eyes to the ground beneath his feet.  “Charisma and I have always been good together.  We’re friends and enjoy a lot of the same things when we actually spend any quality time with each other.  And we learned to be content with what we had together because it meant we had someone on the occasions we needed them.”  He paused and Brianna waited.  Kent looked out at the Mall, the ghost of a smile crossing his face.  “But I had never seen her genuinely happy until I saw her with you.”

Silence reigned for several long moments while Brianna considered his words.  Finally... “Why are you so willing to give up everything, Kent?”

Kent shook his head.  “You’re looking at this the wrong way, Brianna.  I’m not giving up anything except the pretense of a relationship that has served its purpose.”  He hesitated.  “Think of this as coming full circle.  The difference is now we’re part of one another’s circle as well.”

“You’re assuming I’m willing to do something.”

Kent growled and clapped his hands together.  “Women!” he muttered, running his hands through his hair before turning his head to look at her.  “Brianna, I can’t force you to do anything; I wouldn’t dream of trying.  But Charisma and I are separated, and nothing you do or don’t do is going to change that fact.  Would it really be so bad to be happy?”  Brianna didn’t answer and after a few minutes, Kent slapped his knees and rose.  “I need to get going.  I’m supposed to be at Es’ in about fifteen minutes.”  He gave her a look.  “Are you going to be all right?”

Brianna nodded her head, but she refused to speak.  Kent watched her a moment longer, then made his way back to his truck.  He had places to be.

************

“I’m sorry Brianna wasn’t able to come by,” Kay offered as she wrapped her scarf around her neck.  “I know she was going to try; I guess her meeting with Senator Maxwell ran long.”

“Did she really call at six o’clock this morning?” Ruby asked.

Kay nodded and pushed her hair out of her eyes.  “Yes.  Woke me out of a somewhat sound sleep.”

“Any idea what she wanted?”

“She wouldn’t tell Bri, but I know that Brianna wanted to be here.  She wanted Es to know that her friendship and her honesty were more important to Brianna than Brianna’s own anger was.  Because that anger is purely self-directed, you know.”

Ruby smiled gently and patted Kay’s shoulder.  “Oh, I know.  I’ve seen a lot in my lifetime.  We’ll see you at the service tomorrow?”

“Yes.  The family arrived this morning.  We’ll all be there.”

“Thank you, Kay.  It means a lot.”

Kay squeezed Ruby’s hand briefly before exiting the house and closing the door behind her.  Ruby waited until she heard the car pull out of the drive and then headed back into the kitchen where they had been receiving people all day.

“Well,” she said slowly. “That’s everyone except for Brianna and Okasa.”  A knock sounded on the door and Ruby’s head dropped just slightly before she moved back to the door to admit Okasa into their midst.  At least this should be the last for the day, and Ruby would be able to send Esmeralda to bed and find out what was going on with everyone else.

************

Brianna had remained on the bench outside of the National Gallery for a number of minutes after Kent’s departure before realizing she was starting to freeze into place with the lack of activity.  A glance at her watch told her that she had a few minutes before she needed to leave for the Hill and her appointment with Laura Maxwell.  So she mounted the steps and made her way to the Sculpture Galleries, walking briskly until she was standing in front of Diana.  She idly wondered if the goddess had ever given up someone she wanted because it was the best choice for the one she loved.

The angle she stood at made Diana’s features resemble Saphira and her thoughts turned to what Esmeralda had said to her.  And she understood that as far as her friends were concerned anything was worth losing as long as they had one another.  Brianna offered up a short prayer for Esmeralda, then turned her footsteps towards the door.  She had a meeting to attend.

************

“Senator Walker... please come in.  Can I offer you some refreshment?”

Brianna looked at Laura as if she’d grown two heads.  “Senator Maxwell, can we please cut to the chase here?  You called me at six o’clock this morning DEMANDING I meet with you immediately so I’m assuming you felt some sense of urgency.”

Laura gave Brianna a look of bare tolerance as she gestured for her to take a seat.  “It doesn’t mean we can’t at least attempt an effort at civilization,” pouring herself out two fingers of malt whisky before seating herself behind her desk.

“You probably should have thought of that before you called me at oh-dark-thirty this morning.  Now do you want to tell me what was so urgent it couldn’t wait or shall I go?  I actually do have more important things to do today than sit here and play politics with you.”

Laura studied Brianna for a long moment, tapping her fingers against the crystal tumbler.  She took a sip and wrapped her hands around it protectively, then leaned forward.  “Why are you here?”

Brianna blinked.  Whatever else she’d been expecting to hear, this wasn’t even a possibility.  Her eyebrows rose into hairline.  “Are you kidding me??  This was your emergency??”  She stood up.  “I don’t have time for this.”

“Sit down, Senator Walker.”

“Or what, Laura?” dropping the honorific and smirking at the surprise on Maxwell’s face.  “What exactly do you think you’re going to do to me?  I am here by an appointment of the governor of my state because he asked me for a favor.  I’m not running for re-election.  The only thing of relevance in my being here is doing the best I can for the time I’ve been assigned.  I’m going home when this is over.  I have no interest in dealing with the nest of vipers that inhabit this place!”  She paused for breath and modulated her tone.  “So what exactly do you think you can threaten me with?”

“Charisma Tagherty.”

Brianna didn’t even blink, and Laura had to give her kudos for her poise.  Obviously those acting classes had given her a good foundation, and years in the courtroom had only perfected her technique.  Still Brianna didn’t move away from the door, but she was no longer threatening to walk out of it.  She tilted her head and cocked an eyebrow.

“How exactly is Charisma Tagherty a threat to me?”

“She’s not.  You, on the other hand, are an enormous threat to her.”

“You might want to ease off on the Scotch, Senator.  It’s starting to impair your judgment.  Charisma Tagherty and I are nothing but old college roommates who fell out of touch years ago.  We’re merely acquaintances these days.”

“I don’t think that’s true.  And I want you to stay away from her.”

“Strangely I’m not particularly concerned with what you do or don’t think, Laura.  And I’m not going to change my relationship or lack of one with Charisma Tagherty because of your wants.”

Laura Maxwell carefully set her glass in the center of her blotter on her desk before using both hands to push her up from her plush desk chair.  She glared at Brianna, infuriated at the smirk she was receiving in return.  She leaned forward and hissed, “Do you know who I am?”

Brianna grinned widely.  “As a matter of fact, Senator Maxwell, I do.  But I’m pretty sure you have no idea who I am.  So before you get your panties so far in a bunch that shit starts running out your nose, I’d suggest you take a real good look at that file your private dick gave you.  It might help you find a little respect.”

“Why you...!”  Brianna held up a finger and Laura Maxwell stopped speaking.

“Don’t say anything you can’t spin your way out of later, Senator.  I’m just a guest on your turf at the moment, but I won’t be nearly as forgiving of your attitude once I leave here and return to mine.  As far as Charisma Tagherty is concerned, she’s a grown woman and she makes her own decisions.  I’d suggest you leave her to it.  But I promise you I have no influence over anything she says or does.  I haven’t even offered an opinion to her in years.”

“So I’m just supposed to trust that you’ll stay off the radar.  Senator Walker... she can’t afford to have a liability like you around.”

“It’s funny how she’s never mentioned me as a liability.”

“Please, Brianna,” trying to appeal to her sympathetically.  “This is for the good of her campaign.”

“Senator Maxwell, I’ve never interfered with her campaigns before.  I have no reason to start now.  What Charisma Tagherty does is her business.”

“So you’ll stay away from her?  Brianna, I know what she means to you... or what she meant at one time.  Do you really want the world to know?”

“Do you?” Brianna snapped back.  “Because if they find out about me, they will certainly find out about Charisma.  And without her, your dreams of getting anywhere near the White House go up like so much smoke. It’s not like I’m in the closet, Laura, and if you can dig it up how many others do you think will do the same thing?  Maybe instead of trying to intimidate me, you should be more concerned on formulating a campaign strategy so that whatever friendship Charisma and I once had isn’t even part of the platform.”

“You make it sound so easy.”

“You’re making it into something impossible.  Charisma and I have a history; we were best friends once.  But we are merely acquaintance friends now.”  Brianna sighed and turned back towards the door.  “Your detective should have done his homework better.”  She opened the door, then turned to look at Laura once more.  “Don’t call me again.”

The door behind her shut with a firm click before Laura Maxwell could even think to make a response.

************

Brianna strode from Maxwell’s office, and though she knew she was supposed to go see Esmeralda she recognized she was in no state to visit someone in mourning. The fury that was coursing through her veins at the woman’s presumption was making her blood boil, and Brianna knew she needed to calm down.  A phone call to her massage therapist got her an immediate appointment, and it wasn’t long before she was lying naked on the massage table.

Michelle poured the warm oil into her hands before she started, cringing when she touched the rock hard planes of Brianna’s back.  “Should I even ask?” she queried softly as her hands dug into tight, tense muscles.  Brianna flinched at the amount of force that was being wielded against her, but shook her head.

“No.  But go as hard and deep as you can. I need to be a good friend tomorrow, and right now I’m angry enough to....”

“Hey... relax,” Michelle instructed as she ran her fingertips gently over Brianna’s bare back.  “I’ll get you there, but you need to do your part.  Focus on your breathing, all right?  Put everything else out of your mind.”

Brianna nodded and closed her eyes.  “Okay, Michelle.  And thanks.”

“It’s what I’m good at, Senator.  Now listen to the music, and slow your breathing down to match.  Then let me take care of that hard part.”

Brianna closed her eyes and hoped Esmeralda would understand why Brianna needed to be in a good place herself before she could be strong for anyone else.

************

Coral had been gone for some time before Jade finally arrived back at the house and Opal, Turq, Jas and Indi were downstairs in the living room with Amber and Ruby when she arrived.  She had only just gotten her plate from the warming oven and was sitting down to eat when Michael arrived sans wings and fanfare.  The women in the room just looked at him.  He sighed.

“I wanted to let you know – you’re all going to be called home tomorrow after the service is over.  Your assignment’s been completed.”

They all looked at him stupefied, the silence ringing loudly in the interim.  Finally Amber spoke, “Excuse me?  Michael, we told you we were staying with Es for the duration... for however long she needed us.  Why are we being recalled again?”

“The mission is over.  He’s satisfied with the results apparently.  You’re done here.”

“No.”

Michael blinked.  “You don’t get to say no,” he stated though there was a hint of confusion in his tone.  “He’s the one who decides when an assignment is complete.”

“Oh, I’ll agree about the assignment – whatever it really was.  We’ve been over that whole concept for a while now.  But we’re not leaving Es here alone with no support and no family.  You can have my wings if you think I’m going to leave her here to fend for herself.”

“And do what, Amber?  The only person here that has a human job that is hers is Es.  You, Coral, Mal and Jade are all non-corporeal entities here.  These guys,” motioning to the other women seated around the room, “are all holding jobs that will go back to their real life counterparts on Monday.  Turq becomes an Amazon woman, and Jasper becomes a large black man.  Opal goes back to being a fifty-five year old grandmother and the rest revert to their original states as well!  Even Ruby loses her status.  How exactly are you planning to manage??” the frustration clear in his voice.

Ruby cleared her throat and all eyes whipped in her direction.  “Michael, what happened to cause Him to mark this case as closed?”

Michael shrugged.  “He didn’t tell me.  I was just there when it happened?”

“How long ago was it?”

“A few hours by your time – why?”

“It must have been Brianna,” Jade said.  “She had talks with both Kent Rockwell and Laura Maxwell today.  She took Maxwell down like a dog.”  Jade’s brows furrowed,  “I’m still not clear on what either of them were trying to accomplish there to be honest.  But Kent gave her his blessing.”

“For...?”

“For Brianna and Charisma to be together.”

Silence for a few moments as each of them considered the implications of Jade’s words, then Amber turned to Michael once more.  “Have you found Saphira?”  The rest looked at her like she was crazy, but they waited for an answer.  Amber never did anything without a reason.

“Do you really think we need to discuss this now?”

“They’re gonna find out sooner or later, Michael.”

“Find out what?” from Jas.

“Saphira is missing.  She’s not in heaven or in hell or in any afterlife I can find.  It’s like she’s simply vanished.”

“Did you ever consider that she might have?  Angels don’t have souls.”

“Angels don’t die.  And humans have souls.”

“I’m beginning to think we’ve all been played,” Turq said.  “And I don’t really like that feeling.”

“But to what end?” Opal asked.  “What good has any of this done?”

“I bet if we figure that out, we’ll know the secret to life,” Indi offered with a smirk.  “But in the meantime we need to get to bed.  Tomorrow’s going to be a hellishly long day.”

“Only Monday will be worse if we have to fight to stay here,” Amber offered.  Everyone nodded.  “All right then... everyone off to bed,” watching as they waved their goodnights as they headed upstairs.  She turned back to Michael.  “Thank you, Michael.  I know you took a real risk coming here again.”

“Maybe.  But it was worth it.  Take care of each other okay?”

“You too,” brushing his lips with hers before he vanished from sight.  Then she finished locking up and stretched out on the couch.  Tonight she was watching over her own household.


Chapter CI

Esmeralda was glad to take Ruby’s advice and escape to the privacy of her bedroom.  Even with all the memories of Saphira that permeated the space, it still gave her a measure of comfort.  Besides, she was beyond exhausted with the events of the past few days and wanted nothing more than to simply close her eyes and not be for just a little while.

She could hear the rest of her team moving quietly around the kitchen; she was even fairly sure she heard Amber’s voice among them.  The disturbance didn’t last too long, and she figured they had moved into the living room.  Just as she finally felt herself slipping into sleep, she thought she heard Michael, but she was too far beyond caring to bother to check.  Instead Esmeralda slid back into the private dell where she’d found Saphira once before and let herself try to relax.

Esmeralda looked around slowly, surprised to be back in this place so soon.  As much as she knew she needed Saphira in her life like she needed air, she honestly hadn’t expected that the Father would see things the same way.  It made her wonder what was behind her presence here now.  But then she caught a whiff of Saphira’s distinct scent, and she let her concerns roll to the wayside.  There would be time for them soon enough again.

Saphira didn’t speak; she simply spooned up behind Esmeralda and covered them with one massive wing.  For the longest time they simply lay there curled into one another while Saphira’s hand gently stroked Esmeralda’s smooth skin.  Eventually however, Saphira broke the silence.  “How are you, love?”

Esmeralda chuckled, but tears leaked from her eyes at the absurdity of the question Saphira posed.  She shook her head, refusing to face Saphira while she answered.  “You were cremated today.  It was....”

“I can’t begin to imagine,” was the whispered reply.  “You’re doing remarkably well, Es.  I don’t think I would have managed half as much if I was in your place.”  Saphira snorted.  “I’m not doing half as well, and all I’m doing at the moment is sitting around marking time.  You’re still getting things done in the mortal realm.”  She hugged the body in front of her tightly, feeling Esmeralda return the embrace as much as she could.  “I’m proud of you, Es – I love you so much.”

“How much longer, Phira?”

“Oh Sweetheart... I wish I knew.  It’d be now if it was left up to me; you have to know that.”  Saphira reached up a hand and brushed some wayward hair out of Esmeralda’s eyes.  “I do know He closed the books on your mission today.  He’s pulling the girls off the assignment.  He says their job is complete and it’s time for them to come home.”  She paused.  “You need to make sure they do.”

Esmeralda moved away from Saphira’s embrace, rolling until she could stand up and look down at her mate.  “Excuse me?  Shh....” she cautioned before Saphira could respond.  “Let me rephrase – why?”

“I don’t know,” Saphira offered honestly.  “He just gave me time with you in exchange for delivering the message.  And I wasn’t about to turn that down.”

“So you really don’t know anything?”

“I know that He closed the file on Brianna and Charisma this morning; that He wants the girls home; that He expects you to make sure they return even though this is going to be nothing more than a pleasant dream as far as you’re concerned.  Other than that....”

“So what happened?” Esmeralda asked quietly as she reseated herself next to Saphira.  Saphira reached up a hand to help her and proceeded to pull Esmeralda into her lap.  Esmeralda went with the motion, wrapping herself around Saphira’s body and simply holding on.  She tucked her head into Saphira’s neck and relished the light touch that traced up and down her back.  Finally Saphira blew out a breath though the motion never ceased.

“I dunno, honestly.  I’m not sure anyone but He knows to tell you the truth.  No one else has His access, and I’m so far out of the loop, I don’t even register on the radar at the moment.  You probably have a better chance of finding out from whoever’s been watching them lately.”

“I wonder if they’re together then.”

Saphira shrugged.  “Hard to say anymore, but it seems a little rushed if they are given Charisma’s reluctance to be gay and Brianna’s reluctance to trust.”

Esmeralda brushed a kiss over the skin of Saphira’s neck and smiled when she shuddered against the action.  “Well, we can hope for the best while we prepare for the worst again.”  A sigh.  “Does this mean I’ll be going home soon as well?”

“I hope so, Es.  The only reason you were cast out was to be with me.  Since I’m no longer being punished, you shouldn’t be either.”

There was something about that statement that tickled uncomfortably at the back of Esmeralda’s mind, but before she could analyze it, Saphira’s touch changed from teasing to something much more intimate.  And they put aside their concerns and questions to revel in being together again.

************

When Esmeralda woke she felt comforted and she smiled, knowing in her heart that Saphira was watching over her.  Then her smile fell because she knew today they would lay Saphira’s ashes to rest, and she couldn’t fathom anything beyond that.

She stepped from her room to find the kitchen full but silent, and she accepted the cup of coffee Amber handed her without a word.  Everyone kept their eyes fastened on the table and finally Esmeralda cleared her throat, drawing all eyes to her.

“What did I miss?” looking around the table and finding anger and sadness in every pair of eyes that met hers.  When she reached Ruby, Esmeralda closed her eyes and sighed.  “He’s called you home, hasn’t He?” wondering why she was so sure about this. 

“How did you...?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Amber cut in.  “We’re not going.  Not without you.”

Esmeralda smiled gently, the sadness in her eyes cutting deeply into each of them.  “Yes, you are, Amber.  When He calls, you go.  No,” she said, holding up a hand to keep Amber from commenting.  “I am still in charge of you until He releases you from my supervision.  He can’t do that until you go home.  So you’re going to go home and make your reports and whatever else He asks of you because I’d like to know you’ll all be there if I ever need you again.”

“You need us now.”

“Amber, Saphira is dead, and nothing you or I can do is gonna change that.  I have to learn to be alone.  You have to continue to do His work so you can keep an eye on me now and then.  If you give up your place, then who’s gonna keep an eye on me, hmm?”

Amber scowled fiercely and crossed her arms over her chest.  “I don’t like you very much right now.  You cheat.”

“And she’s right,” Ruby stated softly.  “We can do more for her from there than we can from here.  As much as we’d all like to stay, if Es wants us to go we should respect that – it’s her call.  And it’s not like we can’t come visit, right?”

“Right,” Esmeralda agreed with a watery smile.  “Please, Amber.  Do this for me if you won’t do it for yourself.”

Amber continued to glare at Esmeralda.  “You don’t play fair at all.”

“I’m not playing, Amber.  This is my life now... my reality.  There’s not much you can do for me on the mortal plane, but if you’re on the heavenly one....  Who knows?”

Amber sighed deeply.  “Fine.  But I expect you to make some serious effort into surviving here... into living.  You have to take care of yourself, Es.  No starving yourself or giving up and dying.  I will haunt your afterlife if you put me through something like this again.”

“I’ll do my best, Amber, but remember... I’m human now.  And I will die.”

“Me first,” Amber muttered.  “No more coffee then – milk and water only.”

“Chocolate milk?” Esmeralda bartered. 

“Fine.  But no adding extra syrup to the ready-made stuff.”  She glared.  “I know you.  I’ve seen what happens to the chocolate syrup when you think no one else is looking,” attempting to lighten the atmosphere with her levity.

“Deal,” Esmeralda said solemnly.  Then she looked around the table.  “Thank you... all of you... for the time and effort you’ve each put in on this project.  I can’t say it was worth it....”  She looked at Ruby.  “Was it worth it?”

Ruby shook her head.  “We can’t tell.  Jade said there was conversation, but none of us can figure out if it actually means anything or made any kind of difference in the outcome.  As far as we know, they’re still not together.”

Esmeralda nodded.  “Still I appreciate everything you’ve all done to bring this mission to whatever conclusion that’s been reached.  I know it’s not the kind of ending we like, but....”  She shrugged.  “I’ll make sure to commend each of you for your efforts in my report.  You’re proficiencies shouldn’t suffer because of this assignment.”

Turq snorted.  “Pretty sure none of us are worried about our proficiency ratings, Boss.  You sure some of us can’t stay here and...?”

“No, Turq.  I appreciate it – more than I can express to you.  I’m hoping after you all make your reports, He’ll call me home.  But I’m confident He won’t let me go home before then.”

“She’s got a point,” Ruby commented softly.  “But the fact remains that if Es wants us to go home now that we’ve been called, we have an obligation to go.”  She looked at her watch.  “However, if we’re all going to go to the service, we need to start preparing.  Jas and Turq first as I’m sure they’ll be called upon to drive today.”

The two nodded and rose, each pausing behind Esmeralda to offer a silent condolence, then they headed upstairs to their bathrooms.  It was time to start what promised to be a very long day.

************

The service itself was rather short – both Charisma and Brianna spoke briefly, and Amber gave a beautiful eulogy.  What caught Esmeralda by surprise was the number of Very Important People that attended.  Every Senator from her floor was there as were many of their staffers and drivers.  Combined with Charisma’s extended family, Kay’s family, Matilda and Joe, her entire team and a few Angels who’d descended just to offer her their unspoken support, the chapel was full to standing room only capacity.  She was certain she’d even seen Michael in the back once, but when she turned to look for him again he was gone.

When the service was over, Brianna took Esmeralda, Amber and Ruby in her car, and they followed Charisma’s car in what became a massive processional to Charisma’s home. Then it was a matter of greeting everyone and accepting their condolences.  For Esmeralda, this was actually harder than sitting through the service had been.  The only thing harder that she’d experienced to date was actually being forced away from Saphira’s body the night she had died.  Like then, it simply brought home the fact that Saphira was permanently gone from her life.  And though she knew Saphira would watch over her when she was able, that fact offered little comfort to Esmeralda.

Still she bore everyone’s words with good grace.  She knew they meant well, and in the mortal scheme of things, many of these people were considered above her.  So she accepted their condolences with a sad smile and either a handshake or a brief embrace, knowing that most of them would never understand what this loss felt like to her.

Once she was done receiving everyone, Esmeralda looked at Charisma who flanked her on one side due to her hostess status.  Charisma’s eyes wandered over Esmeralda’s face, taking in the exhaustion and sadness.  Without a word, she took Esmeralda’s hand and tucked it into the crook of her elbow, finding Okasa’s concerned gaze and nodding towards the stairway.  Okasa nodded her agreement and assumed the hostess reins.  Charisma led Esmeralda upstairs.

They reached the master bedroom and Charisma went in first, flicking on a light and crossing to close the curtains.  Then she went to the closet and pulled a blanket and pillow from the shelf before turning back to Esmeralda who was now regarding her warily.  Charisma gave her a small smile.

“I’m playing the ‘mom’ card, Es.  You’re exhausted,” motioning to the bed.  Esmeralda sat down automatically but looked at Charisma with confusion.

“But...?” gesturing to the floor and the downstairs area where so many people were still socializing.

“But you need some rest.”  She knelt and removed Esmeralda’s shoes before lifting her feet onto the bed; she smiled when Esmeralda lay down as a matter of course.  “I can handle the people downstairs for a little while, and I promise to come wake you before the mass exodus,” pulling the cover up to Esmeralda’s chin and rubbing her shoulders carefully until the green eyelids fluttered shut.  “Trust me to take care of things, Es.  It’s my job; I’m really good at it.”  Charisma brushed the back of her hand over Esmeralda’s soft cheek.  Esmeralda caught the hand in hers.

“Amber?”

“I’ll keep an eye on her as well, Es.  Or do you want me to send her to you?”

“Thank you, Charisma.”

Charisma squeezed the hand she held, then released it and left to find Amber.

************

It wasn’t hard; with Esmeralda’s departure, the gathering had broken along expected lines.  The Senators except Brianna and Charisma were gathered in Charisma’s study.  The drivers and office personnel, aside from those who were part of Esmeralda’s team, had assembled in the formal living room.  Charisma’s and Kay’s adult family members were ensconced in the kitchen and Amber and the Angels were in the family room with the kids.

Charisma didn’t garner the first ounce of attention when she crossed the threshold; even Adam didn’t look up from where he sat on Amber’s lap.  Charisma chanced to wonder what sort of magic Esmeralda’s and Saphira’s family had that they could mesmerize those around them so easily.  Then Amber saw her and her words ground to a halt as she turned to look at Charisma.

“Senator Tagherty?”

“Charisma please, Amber.  Es has asked for you.”  Amber frowned and Charisma continued.  “She’s upstairs laying down.  She was so tired....”  Amber nodded.

“Thank you, Sen... Charisma.”  Amber set Adam on his feet, and he ran straight to Charisma.

“Mama?  Go see Es?”

Charisma lifted him with a groan.  “Maybe you can help me wake her up after she has a little bit of a nap, Sweetie.  Es is having a really bad day and we need to let her rest for a little while, okay?”

Adam stared at her for a long moment before nodding his agreement.  “’Kay!  Can we go find Br’anna?”

“I think Senator Walker went outside for some air,” Opal offered.  “Maybe Adam and I could go look for her while you and Amber take care of Es?”

Charisma and Adam exchanged a look and then Charisma set him on the floor so he could run to take Opal’s hand.  “C’mon, Op.  Let’s go find Br’anna,” tugging her towards the door.  Then without warning he dropped her hand and ran back to Amber who knelt down to meet him at his level.  Adam threw his arms around her neck.  “Love Amber – love Es.”

Amber hugged him back gently.  “I’ll make sure to tell her, Adam.”  He grinned and ran back to Opal, taking her hand and pulling her from the room.  Amber and Charisma turned to leave the room when Harley spoke up.

“Is there anything we can do Aunt Chari?”

Charisma motioned around the room that was filled with behaving, quiet children.  “You’re doing it, Harley.  Thank you.”  Then she and Amber left the room and headed upstairs.

************

Charisma led Amber to her room and then excused herself to tend to the rest of her guests.  Amber waited until she was down the stairs before she opened the door, glad her vision allowed her to see in the near dark.  She walked swiftly towards the bed, sitting on the edge and letting her hand rest on Esmeralda’s back.  Then she settled herself in to wait.

************

Opal had to slow Adam down long enough to put a coat on him before they left the house, but as soon as that chore was accomplished they headed out into the backyard.  The pool was covered; the garden was only partially visible; the greenery was in place, but much of the color that was so obvious throughout the spring and summer months was yet unplanted.  It made it easy to see that Brianna wasn’t in the immediate vicinity.  It made the pool house the most logical choice of locations, but Opal hesitated to trespass.  Then Adam took the decision out of her hands.

“BR’ANNA!!” yelled at the top of his lungs.

Brianna stuck her head out of the pool house door and looked first at Adam, then Opal, before turning her attention back to Adam again.

“Adam?  Is there a problem, Sweetheart?”

He shook his head.  “Found Br’anna.  Love Br’anna.”

Brianna smiled.  “I love you too, Adam.”  She looked at Opal.  “Was there something...?”

Opal shook her head.  “No, Senator Walker.  Adam wanted to visit Es, but she’s resting so he decided we needed to find you.  I volunteered to help him.”  She paused a moment, then spoke again.  “Is everything all right, Senator?  Is there something I can do?”

“No, Opal – thank you.  I just needed a little air.  I’ll be in to say goodbye shortly.”

“NO!” Adam exclaimed.  “Br’anna come now.”

“Adam....”

“Br’anna come,” he pleaded, tugging on her hand.  “Please?” giving her a beguiling smile.  Brianna and Opal swapped eye rolls then turned their attention to Adam.

“How do you say no to that?” she asked, extending a hand to Adam who took it with alacrity, bouncing on his toes in excitement.  “Come on, Adam.  Let’s go see if Gramma has any hot chocolate on the stove.  It’s cold enough out here to need some, don’t you think?”

He nodded vigorously and took Opal’s hand as well.  And together they made their way back into the warmth of Charisma’s home.


Chapter CII

Amber wasn’t sitting by Esmeralda’s side for very long before the green eyes fluttered open.  Esmeralda remained still for a long moment while Amber continued to gently rub her back; when she was coherent enough to recognize the touch, she deflated just slightly, then turned on her side to meet golden eyes with her own.  Amber let her hand fall to the curve of Esmeralda’s waist with only her thumb stroking the flesh beneath it.  They held one another’s gaze for a number of minutes – silently communicating so many things.  Finally Esmeralda lifted a hand to cover the one resting at her hip and Amber looked down at the warmth enveloping her hand.  She sighed.

“I suppose it’s time?” a question but said more like a statement.

Esmeralda nodded although Amber was no longer looking at her to see the motion.  “I think so.  You know you’re gonna have to go first; the rest won’t go otherwise.”

“This sucks.”

Esmeralda gave her a miserable smile and nodded.  “It does.”  No platitudes and no gilding of the truth – just plain, unvarnished facts.

Amber clutched Esmeralda’s hand in hers and just held it tightly for a moment.  “I want you to know – I’m going to ask to be assigned to you for a while either as your Guardian or in human form.”

“Amber....”

“Es, I can’t not do something.  Please don’t ask me to.”

Esmeralda sighed and shook her head.  “I won’t, Amber; it would be akin to trying to stop a flood with a bucket and paper towel.  But,” she added more forcefully, causing Amber to look at her, “if He says no I expect you to abide by His answer.”

Amber huffed but nodded her head.  “All right.”

Esmeralda studied her expression, seeing the resignation that meant Amber would keep her word despite her desire to do otherwise.  She nodded.  “Thank you,” she offered quietly, tugging gently on the hand she still held.  Amber frowned and put her other hand on the bed to keep from being pulled off-balance.

“Es!!”

“Amber, I want a hug before you go.”

Amber’s eyes went to her hairline.  “Oh.  In that case....”  She offered Esmeralda her other hand and pulled her into a sitting position.  Then she pulled her into a tight hug and held on for dear life for a long time.  Eventually though, Esmeralda pulled back enough to brush a kiss over Amber’s cheek.  Amber released her hold around Esmeralda’s waist to shift her hands to cup her face instead.  She kissed her forehead then leaned their foreheads together.

“I know I’m not Saphira, Es, but I love you, okay?  So please don’t make me have to go through this again for a really long time, all right?”

Esmeralda smiled tenderly.  “I’ll do my best, Amber... promise.”

“Best I can ask then, I guess.”  She pressed her lips to Esmeralda’s forehead once more, then sighed and stood.  “I’m sure the girls will stop by to say goodbye before they leave.”  Esmeralda nodded.  Amber looked around the room awkwardly and ran a hand through her hair.  “Right,” she mumbled and straightened her shoulders.  Esmeralda watched as Amber’s human clothing melted away to be replaced by her angelic garb.  Once the robing was in place, Amber stretched out the wings that had been put away for the short duration she had appeared as a human after Saphira’s death.  “Ahhh....”

Esmeralda chuckled. “Better?”

Amber snorted.  “I’d say you have no idea, but that wouldn’t be true.  I don’t know how the rest of you endure that like you do. The only happy part of it is when it’s over.”

“True, but in fairness I think our wings work a little different.”

“Ow,” Amber grumbled when something popped she wasn’t entirely sure was supposed to.  “I certainly hope so.  One more hug before I go?” she asked, opening her arms and spreading her wings to their maximum reach.  Esmeralda nodded and stood.

“I’m gonna miss you, Amber.”

“Same here, Little Sister.  Love you.”

“Love you too.  Now go home.”  And with that Amber disappeared from sight and was gone.

Esmeralda stood still for another long moment, then drew in a deep breath.  She couldn’t say it didn’t hurt to have to send her family home with no indication of being able to return herself in the near future.  But she knew she was right about them leaving her behind.  She’d manage – she just wasn’t sure what she expected her outcome to be... and she wasn’t sure it mattered anymore.

She crossed back over to the bed and folded up the blankets she’d been using, then took it and the pillow and placed them neatly on the chair near the bed.  Esmeralda stepped into her shoes and headed downstairs.

************

“GRAMMA!” Adam cheered as they crossed the threshold into the kitchen from the backyard.  It caused every family member in the kitchen to look in their direction and smile when they realized that Adam had managed to reclaim their lost sheep.  Brianna tried to appear nonchalant about the whole business, but it was difficult when she was surrounded by the family she felt she had abandoned for the sake of her sanity.  And then Okasa was approaching her and Brianna offered a tentative smile.  Okasa squeezed her arm briefly before turning to Adam.

“So what brings you to the kitchen?” knowing she would need to go check on the plates of hors d’oeuvres and finger foods that had been set out for the numerous guests still occupying Charisma’s home but glad to be out of the melee for the moment.

“Hot chocolate,” Adam said with a grin. “S’cold outside.”

Okasa chuckled lightly.  “I’d heard rumors to that effect actually.  All right, but you’re going to have to be my helper.  I don’t have any ready.”

“Adam good helper,” he assured her as he started pulling at the buttons of his coat.  Brianna took pity on him and knelt in front of him to remove his outerwear.  Almost as if that was some sort of sign, several people started moving around the kitchen.  The girls went to take more plates of food into the dining room and two of the boys and Paddy went to check on their various guests.  Only Brianna, Okasa, Adam, Opal and Hunter were left in the kitchen.  Opal immediately excused herself, citing a need to check with Charisma before she took her leave.

Brianna rose from her knees as Adam took Okasa’s hand and walked to the big stove to start preparing enough hot chocolate for the entire family.  She watched for a moment before deciding that having Adam’s coat in her hand was reason enough to leave the kitchen; from there she could either slip upstairs and keep an eye on Es or simply leave.  Brianna knew that was the coward’s way, but she was so tired.

Before she could move, however, Hunter stepped up beside her to gain her attention, then waited for her eyes to meet his.  He could see so many things swirling around in the depths of her gaze, but he was counting on twenty years of being friend and family to her outweighing all the negative things he could literally feel her struggling with.  When her shoulders slumped, he knew he’d been offered a reprieve and motioned towards the foyer.

“May I walk with you?” asked politely.

“Br’anna?” Adam asked, cocking his head curiously and nearly enveloped by the apron Okasa had swathed him in.  “Hot chocolate?”  She gave him a weak smile.

“I’ll be back, Little Man.  I need to hang up your coat and check on Es, okay?”

“’Kay!” he agreed emphatically, turning his attention back to stirring the milk. Just then, Harley entered the kitchen holding Michelle’s hand, and Adam’s attention was immediately directed towards them.  Hunter and Brianna escaped out the other door, seeing the rest of the grandchildren start streaming in from the family room.

Brianna slowly walked up the stairs towards Adam’s room, and Hunter kept pace right beside her though neither of them spoke a word.  They entered the bedroom and Brianna smiled in reflex at how perfectly ‘Adam’ it was.  She crossed to the closet, giving Hunter a look.

“Can you please say whatever it is you need to say, Hunter?  I don’t mean to be rude, but this weekend has already been years long, and I’m not sure how much more I can take.”

He gazed at her thoughtfully though he maintained his respectful attitude.  As much as he wanted to offer her comfort, Mama had given them all strict instructions about keeping their distance and allowing Brianna to instigate any familiarity between them.

“Is there anything I can do to make it better?” he finally asked.  Brianna’s chuckle was weary.

“I wish a hug would make it better, Hunter.  I really do.  But I gave up believing in faerie tales a long time ago.”  She shook her head and sighed.  “I’m sure that’s not what you were going to ask.”

“I wasn’t going to ask anything actually.  I was elected to reiterate what Mama said to you the other day.”  He held up a hand.  “Mama sat all of us kids down and told us what you did and why.  She asked us to respect your decision.  We talked about it and just wanted you to know that we’ll do our best to abide by your wishes.  But if you should ever change your mind....”

“I... thank you, Hunter.  I wish it didn’t have to be like this, but I don’t know what else to do at this point.  I can’t keep....”

This time he opened his arms, and Brianna stepped willingly into his embrace.  “We understand, Bri – probably as much or better than you do.  That’s why we agreed to do as you asked.”

She nodded her head against his chest and gave another brief squeeze before pulling out of the hug.  It was harder than she’d ever expected.    “I’m going to go check on Es, and then Ill be back in the kitchen.  I promised Adam, and I’d like to say goodbye to everyone since they’re all here.”

Hunter smiled and wiped at his eyes unashamedly.  “They’d like that – they all would.”  He motioned her out of the room in front of him and closed the door behind them.  “Would you like some company or should I wait for you downstairs?”  But before Brianna could give him an answer, the door to the master bedroom opened, and Esmeralda exited.  Immediately they flanked her on either side.

“Es?” Brianna asked as she looked her over carefully.  Esmeralda didn’t appear any more rested than she had before Charisma had brought her upstairs, but there was a calm resignation in her demeanor that made Brianna and Hunter frown.

“I need to get downstairs so everyone will leave Charisma’s home, and you can all get back to your normal lives.”

“Es, if you need to rest a while longer, Charisma is perfectly capable of dismissing everyone here without twitching an eyelash.”

“It’s okay, Brianna,” Esmeralda replied, giving her a small smile.  “I need to do this.  I need to say goodbye.”

Brianna and Hunter exchanged alarmed glances, then Brianna took Esmeralda’s hand in hers.  “All right, Es... all right.  We’ll go downstairs together, then Hunter will let everyone know you want to say goodbye, okay?”

Esmeralda nodded jerkily, and Hunter headed downstairs instantly. A whistle brought his brothers running, and in another minute the family had scattered throughout the house to let everyone know that Esmeralda wanted to say goodbye to them.

For most the pleasantry was perfunctory at best, and they were glad to be done with it so they could return to normalcy tomorrow.  Though they liked Esmeralda and appreciated her efforts on their behalf, none of them really knew her beyond greetings and casual talk at work.  And though they were all glad they had taken the time to offer their support of her in her hour of need, they couldn’t fathom the sense of loss she radiated from the depths of her soul.  So it was with a great sense of relief that they bid her adieu and left Charisma’s home to go back to their lives.

Only the Angels were different.  And they were different for so many reasons beyond human though no one but they and Esmeralda knew the truth about that of course.  But they chose to be the last to go, and they took a little more time to say goodbye, knowing it was going to be the last interaction they had with Esmeralda for the foreseeable future. 

She watched as they changed from human to Angel, and wondered that no one commented on the differences in either their appearance or their demeanor.  Only Turq and Jas remained as they still had responsibilities to fulfill that evening.  They would transform once they had been dismissed at the end of the day.  Still the lack of reaction left Esmeralda a little confused; it was only when Ruby leaned forward and reminded her that no one could see what they didn’t want seen that Esmeralda realized she was beyond much lucid thought.

Then Adam scooted from the kitchen and stopped short, gaping at the sight in front of him.  “Angels,” he commented, reaching out a hand to brush against Ruby’s robe.  “Br’anna... Angels,” speaking to the woman who had stayed by Esmeralda’s side.  She looked at him even as the Angels exchanged exasperated glances.  They had forgotten they could hide from everyone except the innocents and Adam was still young enough to be such.

Fortunately Brianna simply agreed with his assessment of the group of women saying their goodbyes to Esmeralda and she turned to them with a tired smile.  “I think we should probably go find Mama and see how that hot chocolate’s coming along.  Es, will you be all right for a few minutes?” not wanting to leave her alone, but confident that Esmeralda wasn’t up to Adam’s energetic enthusiasm either.  Esmeralda nodded.

“I’ll be okay, Brianna.  Thank you for keeping me company.”

Brianna nodded.  “Come to the kitchen if you get done before I get back.  I promised I’d have hot chocolate and say goodbye to everyone before I left, and I’m giving you a ride home,” her tone brooking no argument.  Esmeralda simply bobbed her head in acknowledgement and Brianna sighed in relief.  Then she lifted Adam into her arms with a groan and turned back towards the kitchen.  The Angels waited until they were gone, then Ruby stepped forward and wrapped Esmeralda in a hug.

“Amber already gone?” she asked, tucking a stray strand of hair behind Esmeralda’s ear.

“Yes.  I sent her first.  I knew she’d be the hardest.”  The rest smiled.

“We’ll miss you Es,” Opal chimed in, claiming a hug for herself.

“You know where to find me if He lets you visit.”

“We do indeed,” Indi agreed.

“We’ll be watching,” Mal offered.  Jade and Coral didn’t say anything – just took their hugs behind Mal.  When each Angel had had her turn, Esmeralda stepped back slightly.

“Go now.  And thank you all... for everything.”

They bowed their heads to her for a brief minute, and then they were gone.  Esmeralda stood in the foyer for another long moment gathering her strength, then she turned and headed in the direction Brianna had gone. 

************

Charisma stood in her empty study, appreciating the silent respite even while she knew it couldn’t last but a minute.  She and Kent had decided to tell the family about their separation, and she was fairly confident that it was going to create an uproar even if it was only of miniscule proportions.  Because while she knew her family would support whatever decision she made... especially if it brought Brianna back to them... she wouldn’t have them blaming Kent for ruining her career.  And she knew as well as she knew she was a United States Senator that they would try to blame him.  So she stood in the silence simply breathing, trying to muster her courage for the upcoming ordeal.  She jumped when a hand landed on her arm and she cut her eyes at the intruder.  Then Charisma chuckled when she realized it was Kent standing by her side.

“You all right?” asked with concern.

“Yes.  Just trying to prepare myself for the inevitable fallout.”

“Charisma, I think you’re overestimating their reaction – I mean, if I figured out about you and Brianna in just a few months, do you really think the people who have known you both for twenty-five years are really going to be surprised?”

“It’s not that – well... not just that.”  Kent smiled at her.

“I don’t mind being the scapegoat, Charisma.  After all, I did have the papers drawn up.”

“NO!” Charisma replied forcefully.  “I’m not going to lie about this, Kent.  You may have drawn up the papers, but this is on me.  I was the one who wasn’t totally honest.”

“And tomorrow?  When you talk to Senator Maxwell?”

Charisma sighed.  “She’s not going to like it, but she’s going to need to know the truth.”

“If it makes you feel better, Charisma, I think you might actually find real happiness with Brianna.”

“Only if I get another chance, Kent, and I’m not sure she’s willing to give me one,” shaking her head to hide the tears even as she smiled for him.  “You, on the other hand, should definitely be able to find your heart’s desire now.”

“Yee-eah,” he drawled, scratching his chin idly.  “It might help if I knew what that was.”

Charisma laughed.  “At least you have the opportunity to figure it out.  C’mon,” she sighed, tangling her fingers lightly through his.  “Let’s go do this.”  And together they left the office and moved towards the kitchen... united in purpose one more time.

Part 18