Chapter LXXIII

Brianna stretched out on the bed with a sigh of contentment.  Notwithstanding the fact that she knew she was running away again, the only feeling she could dredge up about it this time was one of peace.  She was tired and she felt as though she’d been buffeted by hurricane force winds for the last few months.  At least before tempestuous hadn’t meant she got beaten black and blue on a daily basis.  And that’s how she felt – in the very depths of her soul.  She felt like she’d been beaten with a stick every day since accepting the appointment as interim Senator.  She’d expected it to be hard, she hadn’t expected it to be deadly.

And despite how melodramatic that sounded, it was how she felt – like she was dying inch by slow inch.  Brianna took a deep breath.  She hadn’t even realized she was suffocating... drowning... until she left... until she arrived in Dubai and felt everything slip from her shoulders.  She’d have to remember to do something really nice for Indi – this had been a spectacular choice.

Brianna turned to look at her view and smiled when a school of fish swam past her room.  Who knew you could have an underwater panorama if you chose the right resort to visit?  She clicked on the flat-screen and perused the choices of activities at the resort.  And for the first time in months felt her creative juices stirring.  She might be able to get a novel or two out of this adventure. 

But first she needed to call Esmeralda.  She had promised to keep in touch and being half a world away wasn’t going to change that.

************

“Brianna – you didn’t have to call me from Dubai,” Esmeralda said with a tiny laugh.  “I can certainly understand wanting to get away from the snow and the cold for a while.  I definitely would too given the opportunity… even without the extenuating circumstances.”

“You don’t think I’m a coward, Es?”

“Brianna – what I think shouldn’t matter.  Do you think you’re a coward?”

Brianna sighed.  “I think I’m tired, Es.  I’ve tried everything I know to try.”

“Then take a break, Brianna.  Maybe you’ll come back with a fresh outlook.”

“Maybe I’ll finally be able to put it to rest once and for all.”

“Maybe,” Esmeralda said as noncommittally as she could manage.  “I guess this means we won’t be seeing you around Christmas though, huh?”

“Not this year, Es.  But is there anything I can bring you back from here?”

“Just yourself home safely, Brianna.  I’ll miss having you around to talk to while you’re gone.”

Brianna chuckled.  “I’ll still call you every few days, Es.  The phones work here just like they do in Washington.  And you have my number if anything comes up, right?”

“I do.”

“All right.  I’ll talk to you in a couple days then, okay?”

“Have a good time, Brianna.  Take some pictures and relax.”

“I will – talk to you soon.”

“Be happy, Brianna.”

“Bye, Es.”

************

“Es, this is Charisma.”

“Hey Charisma!  How are you enjoying the break?” having a fairly good idea after hearing about things from Indi and Coral especially, but wondering what Charisma would offer as her truth.

“Staying busy.  For some reason the holidays don’t mean less work... just different,” smiling when she got a chuckle from Esmeralda.  “How about you, Es?  Are you getting some rest?”

“I’m becoming a spoiled lady of leisure,” Esmeralda responded lightly.  “I haven’t felt this good since... I’m not sure I’ve ever felt this good actually.  I feel almost made over.”

“That’s wonderful, Es... just amazing.  I guess Saphira is thrilled with the turnaround?”

Esmeralda laughed.  “I’m pretty sure that’s an understatement, Charisma.  I haven’t seen her this relaxed in a long time – like she’s carrying a much lighter burden.”

“She is, Es, and Mama will be happy to hear it for both of your sakes.  She asks about you every time we talk.”  Charisma wavered a moment, then pushed on.  “Will you be joining us for Christmas?”  She almost felt Esmeralda’s eyes widen in shock.  “You’re family now, you know.”

“Oh Charisma – that’s...  it’s wonderful of you to say so, but I don’t think we can.  Even if we had a way to get there, I don’t see how we could go this year.  Saphira is picking up as many extra shifts as Matilda will let her have, and I wouldn’t leave her here by herself even if it was an option for me.  But I appreciate the thought... we both do.  Make sure to give the family our love, won’t you?”

“You know I will,” Charisma assured her with a smile that could be heard over the phone.  “I expected that answer, but I promised Mama I’d ask.  Don’t be surprised if I come by the day after with a truckload of stuff for you both though.  You know how Mama is.”

“I do indeed.  You’re very lucky.”

“Mama reminds me of that all the time,” Charisma snorted.  Esmeralda laughed again.  “Listen Es,” Charisma said before the silence could become uncomfortable.  “Do you by any chance... have you been in touch with Brianna lately?”

Esmeralda sighed.  She’d wondered if she would get out of this unscathed, then shook her head.  She should have known better.  “Um... yeah - she called me yesterday.  Said she’d had enough of the cold and snow and was gonna spend a little time in the sun before Congress resumed in January.”

“You didn’t happen to ask where she was did you?”

“No... it didn’t occur to me to ask,” not mentioning she hadn’t needed to since Brianna had freely shared the information with her.  “Why?  Is something wrong, Charisma?”

“What?  No – she asked me for a copy of something,” looking at the picture of the two of them at Trevi Fountain.  It made Charisma want to cry, but she took a deep breath to fortify her nerves.  She’d promised Brianna a copy and she was damn well going to deliver despite everything.  “But I haven’t been able to reach her so we could plan a time for me to get it to her.  I tried calling her, but....”  A pause.  “Do you know if she called you from her cell phone?”

“I don’t know, Charisma.  I didn’t ask.  I assumed she did.”  When silence met her answer Esmeralda pushed a little, having a very good idea what Charisma was talking about.  “Charisma, is it something you could send to her by email?”

“Not really... I mean, I guess I could if I had to.  But at the moment it’s just a hard copy item.”

“Is it something you could scan in or is it like a book?”

Charisma sucked in another deep breath then covered her mouth, pressing hard against her lips to keep the tears at bay.  She cleared her throat.  “No... it’s something I could scan in.  It’s a picture we had taken together when we were in Rome years ago.”

“Well, if it’s important enough that it can’t wait for her to return from her trip, maybe you could scan a copy in and send it to her by email.  You can always give her a hard copy once she returns,” knowing that it was more than important to both of them.

Charisma slowly released the breath she’d been holding and nodded her head even though Esmeralda couldn’t see her reaction.  “I suppose I could do that.  I may have to make a few phone calls first though,” she added as an aside.

“Charisma?” Esmeralda’s voice rising almost as much as her eyebrows.

Charisma gave her a deprecating chuckle.  “Es, I turn the computer on and I turn the computer off.  For everything else I have interns and personal assistants.”  She shook her head.  “Sometimes I have interns and personal assistants for that too actually, come to think of it,” she added drolly.

Esmeralda laughed.  “Well, Charisma – I know your staff is supposed to be on vacation.  So if you can’t figure it out and you can’t get ahold of someone, you let me know.  I’ll come by and give you a hand.”

“You’d do that?  Es, that’s so sweet.  I’ll tell you what – is Saphira working tomorrow?”

“Yes, of course.”

“How about if I pick you both up about nine-thirty?  You can come over and share brunch with me, and if I haven’t figured out how to scan this thing in by then, you can help me figure it out... or show me how to do it.  Whatever works.  We can drop Saphira off at the diner on our way back to your house.”

“Are you sure?”

Charisma frowned.  “What do you mean am I sure??  Of course I’m sure.  So it’s a date?”

“You bet, Charisma; it’s a date.”

************

“The house seems so quiet without Adam,” Saphira commented when they were ensconced in Charisma’s study after brunch the following day.  Esmeralda glared at her and Saphira shrugged.  “What??  It’s the truth.  I miss my little buddy.”

Charisma laughed.  “It is.  And I’m sure he misses you too.  My mother still hasn’t cured him of streaking through the house naked yet.”

“Tell her to turn the heat off,” Esmeralda instructed seriously.  “After about the third time that one was cured,” gesturing to Saphira who gave an incredulous looking Charisma her best sheepish grin.

“What??” she asked again.  “We were all born naked; it’s a perfectly natural state.”

“So is snow and ice – it doesn’t mean I want it parading through the house in the middle of winter.  Especially when we’ve got people living with us... even if they are family.”

Charisma blinked and shook her head.  “You two continue to confound me, honestly,” meeting the twin looks of disbelief that gazed back at her.  “What?  I’m not kidding.  You’re both so different from anyone I’ve ever met.  I’m sure I’ve never known a couple like the two of you.”

“Not even in your family?”

Charisma shook her head.  “Not even – it’s not that they’re not all happily married and don’t love each other, but you two seem like such a part of one another.  It’s just... it’s hard to describe.  But it’s very different from anything I’ve ever known.”

Saphira’s eyebrows went into her hairline. “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”

“A little of both, I think.  It’s a good thing for me because I know you and have gotten to experience something... amazing.  It’s a bad thing that I don’t really know more like you.  The world could use more people like you two in it.”

“Yeah,” Esmeralda agreed as she met Saphira’s eyes, love and mischief twinkling out of hers in equal proportions.  “A little bit crazy always helps.”

“Especially if the crazy fits perfectly with someone else’s,” Saphira added with a laugh.   Charisma laughed with them and shook her head. 

“We’re going to miss you at Mama’s table in a couple days.  Are you sure you can’t come?  I could stay and give you a ride up and back.”

Saphira shook her head.  “No, Charisma.  I don’t get off until four on Christmas Eve and I have to be back for a lunch shift the day after Christmas.  Thank you though – we appreciate the thought more than you’ll ever know.”

“If you’re sure....”

“We are.  So when are you leaving?”

“Well, since I wasn’t able to talk you into changing your minds, I guess I’ll leave this afternoon.”

“I guess we better see if we can make this thing work, then,” Esmeralda said.  She motioned to the laptop sitting on the desk.  “Do you mind or...?”

“Please.  It’s password protected so let me know when you’re ready for me to do my part.”  Saphira moved around Esmeralda, hooking up the scanner to the computer and in a few moments they had Charisma set up and ready to go.  She just looked at them.  “Wait... that’s it?”

“That’s it.  All we need now is the picture, and we’ll scan it in.  Then you can attach it to an email and send it on its merry way.”

“Well, well – I’ve learned something new today.  I guess you really can teach an old bitch new tricks.”  Charisma snorted at the shocked expressions on her companions’ faces.  “Please... like I don’t know what they say about me in the halls and offices.  You can’t be a woman in my business and not be a bitch as far as your colleagues and most of the rest of the world are concerned... not if you’re going to get somewhere.  Now show me where the picture is.”

“We need to scan it in first,” Esmeralda reminded her with a gentle smile that held the tiniest hint of teasing.  “You haven’t actually given it to us yet.”

Charisma just shook her head and crossed to the coffee table where the album was resting once more.  “One day,” she said looking at them pointedly as she thumbed through the album to retrieve the picture she needed.  “One day, you’re going to get old just like me.  And while I know I’m politely considered middle-aged by most of society, the fact is that I am getting old. The mind isn’t what it once was and neither is the body.”

“I don’t know, Charisma – I don’t think you have much to worry about on either score,” Esmeralda offered honestly.  “A lot of women pay good money to look as fabulous as you do.”

Charisma smirked.  “And what makes you think I don’t?”

“I’ve seen your Mama.”

Charisma’s jaw snapped closed so quickly she almost bit her tongue.  She cut her eyes at Esmeralda who returned the look with an innocent expression.  Charisma turned her attention to Saphira who was struggling not to laugh.

“You better keep your eye on her, Saphira.  She’s sneaky.”

“And very good at it,” Saphira added without missing a beat.  She accepted the photograph Charisma handed over.  She put it on the scanner, then nodded to Esmeralda, and in another moment the job was complete.

“There you go, Charisma – all done.”

Thank you... both of you.  I appreciate the help.”

“We were happy to do it.  It’s a beautiful picture – looks like a precious memory.”

“It was,” Charisma replied firmly, effectively ending that line of conversation.  “So where is the picture?” coming to stand behind Esmeralda.

With a click Esmeralda showed her and in another moment Charisma had sent the email winging towards Brianna’s inbox.  Then Charisma turned and looked at her friends.  “C’mon – we need to get going if Saphira’s not going to be late for her shift.”

Saphira and Esmeralda exchanged glances, then nodded at Charisma and followed her from her study and out to the garage.  Obviously they had upset her with their observations.

************

“Did she say anything else to you after you dropped me off at the diner?” Saphira asked Esmeralda much later that evening when they were getting ready for bed.  She stepped into the bathroom to brush her teeth and Esmeralda followed her in with a hairbrush, gently pulling the tangles and snarls out of the long, dark hair.  Saphira moaned in response and relaxed into the touch, garnering her a smile from Esmeralda.

“She apologized for being so curt – said she was embarrassed because she needed our help for something so obviously simple and basic.”

Saphira arched a brow and snorted.  “She needs to add denial to the skill section of her resume.  Did she really think you would buy something that lame as an explanation?”

“She hoped I would.  You didn’t see the desperation in her eyes when she proffered her regret.”

Saphira nodded, spitting and rinsing before she turned to ask,  “Have you heard from Opal or Coral?”

“Briefly.  Brianna is enjoying Dubai.  She’s relaxing; getting out in the sun; seems to be writing a lot.”

“And Indi...?”

“Said Charisma made it safely to Mama’s.  Kent is supposed to be there tomorrow night so he’s there when Adam gets up on Christmas Eve.”

“So things are status quo?”

“As far as I know.  I haven’t heard any differently from Mal.”

Saphira stretched and dropped her robe at the end of the bed, then climbed naked under the covers with a sigh.  The sigh became a growl when she watched Esmeralda do the same before she slid along Saphira’s length.

“Have I mentioned how happy I am that you’re feeling so much better?” Saphira asked as her hands began to wander over naked skin.  She grinned rakishly when Esmeralda shivered at her touch, then urged her down until her mouth could take possession of Esmeralda’s lips.

Esmeralda giggled when they separated for air, burying her face in Saphira’s neck and nipping along the tendons until she reached the shell of Saphira’s ear.  “You may have mentioned it once or twice recently,” she whispered, “but I never tired of you expressing your joy on the subject.”  She bit down lightly on the earlobe near her lips, then found herself flipped on her back with Saphira crouched over her like a predator.

“Well then,” her blue eyes flashing fire and her voice causing a thrill to chase up Esmeralda’s spine.  “Allow me to express my joy again,” she commanded, leaning down and capturing Esmeralda’s lips in a passionate embrace once more.

“As often as you like, Love... as long as you remember that I get a turn too.”

“In that case, Sweetheart, I may need to call in sick tomorrow.  Because I plan to take my time with you... all night long.”  Saphira didn’t give Esmeralda the chance to respond verbally, but words weren’t necessary to facilitate their conversation.


Chapter LXXIV

“We probably should have slept a little,” Saphira commented with a smile as sunlight started creeping into the bedroom some hours later.  She and Esmeralda were cuddled up together in the middle of the bed and her hands traced random patterns over Esmeralda’s sensitive skin.

“Why?” Esmeralda asked as she leaned up on one elbow to allow her to look down into twinkling blue eyes.  “Are you tired?” pushing dark bangs off of Saphira’s face.  Saphira chuckled and cupped Esmeralda’s cheek, stroking the skin with her thumb.

“I have enough energy at the moment to run a marathon,” Saphira confessed.  “But you....”

“... haven’t felt this wonderful in forever, Phira.  It’s always been amazing for me to be loved by you, but last night it was like we were new all over again.”

“For me too, Es.  I’ve missed being with you like this.”

“Me too.  I think this break has been good for both of us.”

“I know it has,” Saphira countered.  “And having Ruby take some of the workload and since Matilda has hired the new girl....”

“You’ve had an almost human schedule.”

Saphira laughed.  “I have indeed.  It’s been nice... almost restful.  Now if Charisma and Brianna would just get with the plan....”  Saphira tugged on Esmeralda’s arm and waited until she resettled herself before she curled around her.  “What did you think of that photograph Charisma sent Brianna yesterday?”

“About the picture itself?  I think it’s very telling.  About the fact that she sent it?  I think she wants things both ways, and frankly I hope Brianna doesn’t let her have it.”

“Do you think Brianna’s strong enough not to give in to her?”

Esmeralda sighed thoughtfully and considered her answer.  “I do.”  She turned so she could see Saphira’s profile in her periphery.  “You didn’t hear her when she called the other day, Love.  She sounded so heart sore.  And we know she said goodbye this time – to Charisma and Okasa.”

“You know as anxious as I’ve been for this to be over with, I’m a little sad coming to the end.”

Esmeralda crinkled her forehead and twisted until she could look into Saphira’s eyes.  “Why do you say that?”

“I’m sad because it looks like all your efforts and that of your team are going to have been in vain as far as Brianna and Charisma are concerned.  Because I don’t see Charisma leaving the land of denial – she’s been there for twenty years and it’s known and comfortable for her.  And if Brianna has given up, then there really isn’t much of anything left, is there?”

“Then why hasn’t He called us home... or at least them home?  Ruby and the girls are still here.”

Saphira shrugged.  “Maybe we have to wait until Brianna and Charisma see each other again before it’s final.  I dunno.  What I do know is that I have to get ready for work.  Wanna shower with me?”

Esmeralda grinned.  “Now when have you ever known me to turn down an offer like that?” 

The closing of the bathroom door cut off the sound of their banter.

************

“Kent... come in, come in.  No need to stand on ceremony; you should know that by now.”  Kent ducked his head in acknowledgement of Patrick’s words as he ushered him inside the study.  “Did you have a good trip?”

“Mercifully short and free from stoppage,” Kent said with a smile, nodding his head when Patrick held up a bottle of single malt whisky.  He set his bag on one side of the room and dropped his jacket on top of it.  “I didn’t actually expect anyone to be up this late, but I saw your light so I thought I’d take a chance and see if you were still awake.”

“Just taking a little break,” motioning around the room at the different Christmas gifts he was assembling for some of the older grandchildren.  Kent winced and took a seat in the chair across from the one Patrick seated himself in

“Would you like some help?”

“I’d be delighted to accept,” Patrick replied instantly.  “I’m thankful the kids are spaced out enough that I don’t have to do all eleven of them at once.  Two or three a year is enough.”

“It makes me thankful to have one child,” Kent said.

“So you and Charisma aren’t planning anymore then?”  Patrick was well aware of what Charisma had told Okasa and the rest at Thanksgiving, but he was curious about Kent’s feelings on the subject.

“No, I don’t think so, Paddy.  It’s hard enough to find time to spend with Adam.  I don’t see how adding more children to the mix would help.” Kent didn’t mention the fact that he didn’t expect to ever be that intimate with Charisma again, to say nothing of married to her, though he supposed she could surprise him by fighting for their marriage.  He didn’t think she would though, and he found he wasn’t unduly upset by that fact.  At least they would have an ending instead of continuing to live in limbo.  Kent started when Patrick leaned forward and placed a hand on his arm.

“You all right, Kent?  I didn’t mean to throw a wrench into things by asking.”

Kent chuckled.  “You didn’t, Paddy.  I’m just tired and my mind tends to wander.”

“Everything’s all right then?”

“Everything’s good actually.  The play’s doing really well; business at the restaurant is steady.”  He shrugged.  “No complaints.”

Patrick smiled.  “That’s good to hear.”  He swallowed his whisky and rose and Kent did the same.  They moved back to the pile of parts Patrick still had to assemble.

“So I guess I’m the last to arrive?” Kent asked as he grabbed the frame Patrick motioned to and held it steady while Patrick slid the handlebars into place and took the lock nut Kent offered.  Patrick chuckled and nodded.

“Yes – Charisma arrived yesterday afternoon and you arrived tonight, or this morning rather.  And since we don’t count the boys and their families because they live here, that would definitely make you the last.”

“Wait... where’s everybody else?  I know Mother is overseas.  She called and told me she would be in London over the holidays visiting an ‘old friend’.”  Kent looked his understanding of just what kind of friend he suspected his mother was sharing the holiday with and Patrick nodded his understanding.  “But where are the rest that were here for Thanksgiving?  The new friends we met,” not mentioning anyone by name.

“Different things came up, I guess.  Kay and her family have never spent Christmas Eve or Christmas day with us.  They have always come on the twenty-eighth... halfway between Christmas and New Year’s.  Charisma said that Saphira had to work and of course Esmeralda chose to stay with her.”  Patrick paused.  “Mama really likes them.”

“You don’t?”

“What??  No, I do too.  But you know the old saying so as long as Mama’s happy....” seeing Kent acknowledge the truth of his words.  “They seemed like genuine people and it was funny to watch Saphira confound Hunter.  Not many do that.”

“That’s true – I’d like to see the video of that.”

“Pretty sure we can accommodate you,” Patrick assured Kent with a smile.  He tightened the last sprocket on the bike Kent held and sighed.  Kent set the finished bike aside, and they moved on to the next one.  He waited until Patrick had the handlebars in place before he spoke again.

“What about Brianna?”

Patrick shrugged.  “I’m not sure.  Mama said... Mama said Brianna was going out of town.”

“You don’t believe her?”

“No, I do.  I just don’t understand why Brianna left so suddenly.  According to Mama it was a last-minute decision.  I’m kind of curious as to what prompted it.”  Even as the words spilled from Patrick’s lips, Kent found himself wondering the same thing.  Then he brought his attention back to Patrick who was still speaking.  “... hasn’t been here for Christmas Eve in a long time, she’s always shared part of the Christmas holiday with us.”

“You don’t think she’ll share with you when she gets back?”

Patrick met Kent’s eyes, and Kent could see the unhappiness.  “I don’t think she’s coming back, Kent.  Not here anyway.  She told Mama goodbye.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m not sure I do either.  I just know what Mama said.  And Mama is rarely wrong about this kind of stuff.”  Kent nodded and they fell silent and focused their attention on the task at hand.

************

Brianna hissed as the masseuse loosened yet another knot in her shoulders.  “Dig deep, Ramon.”

The big man above her smiled and added more pressure to his efforts, chuckling silently when he got a loud groan for his trouble.  “Better, Ms Walker?”

“So much.  I can’t tell you how wonderful....”

“You do not have to – your body speaks for itself.  I do not know what you have done to develop such knots of stress, but I would like to recommend that you endeavor to end such activities.”

“Soon, Ramon - a year and a half or so... give or take.”

“If I was you, I would give as long as I removed myself from it.”

“I’ll take your words under advisement.”

“You do that, Miss.  You will feel better for it.”  He shifted his attention from her shoulders to her neck and she sucked in a breath at the pain that rippled through her.  Ramon lifted his hands and stepped back from the table; Brianna shifted so she could look at him.  “I am sorry, Ms Walker.  Would you like me to work those out or move on to something less painful for you?”

“Make them go away, Ramon.  A little pain now will mean less pain later.  But maybe not quite as firmly to begin with?”

He nodded and walked back to the bed, easing her with his touch and feeling her relax again under his ministrations.  “So how do you like Dubai, Miss?”

“I like it very much,” Brianna replied without hesitation.  “It may be my first visit, but I don’t think it will be my last.”  She chuckled and Ramon smiled in puzzlement though he never stopped his strokes along her neck.  “I may have to take you home with me though.”

“Why Miss Walker – what would my wife say?”

“Take me with you?”

This time Ramon laughed aloud and Brianna laughed as well at the joyful sound he made.  When he had himself under control once more, he resumed his massage.  “You have met my wife, have you?” his voice still full of mirth.  “Because that sounded very much like her.”

“It’s what I would say to you if I was her.  However, I’m not going anywhere yet.  I have more than a week left here, and I plan to enjoy every single minute I’ve got.”

“Good – you should enjoy the steam room next.  It will help keep you loose.”

Brianna snorted.  “Any looser and I’m going to be a puddle on the floor.”  She sat up and wrapped herself in the sheet Ramon had covered her with.  He offered her a hand to help her stand, then motioned her towards the steam room.  She bobbed her thanks.  “Thank you, Ramon.  I can’t tell you how marvelous I feel.”

“Come see me again before you leave.  Perhaps it will keep your shoulders from mutating into knots again.”

“I have scheduled myself with you for an hour at this time every day for the rest of my stay.”

Ramon nodded.  “Very good, Miss.  I will see you on the morrow then.”  Without another word Ramon strode from the room and Brianna took a deep breath before heading in the opposite direction for the steam bath that awaited her.

************

Charisma frowned at Kent when he crossed the threshold into the kitchen late Christmas Eve morning freshly showered and shaved.  She hadn’t heard him come in the night before, and in fact he hadn’t been in the bedroom when she had woken some time earlier.  He walked over and brushed a kiss over her cheek before accepting the mug of coffee Okasa held out to him.  Kent kissed her as well and moved to sit at the table.

“I’m sorry I’m so late, Mama,” he started, but she waved him off before he could finish.

“Don’t worry about it, Kent.  Paddy told me what happened last night.”  She glanced at the clock.  “All things considered, it’s not really that late.  And since the boys and their families won’t be here for another few hours, it’s all good.”

“Wait,” Charisma cut in.  “What happened last night?”  She looked at Kent.  “Why didn’t you come to bed?  Or are you just now arriving?”

“Take it easy, Charisma.  I got in early this morning, but then I helped Paddy put the....”  He looked around carefully and didn’t see Adam, but he still lowered his voice before he continued.  “The bikes and things together.  So it was a lot closer to daylight than dark when I finally made it upstairs.  I didn’t want to disturb you so I crashed in the guest room Mother usually uses when she’s here.”

Charisma took a moment to really look at her husband and she frowned again.  “Is everything okay?” she asked suddenly.  “You look tired.”

Kent smiled.  “I am tired, but everything’s good... really.  Work is keeping me busy in a good way of course and I still haven’t caught up from last night.”  He turned to Okasa.  “I don’t know how he does that every single year.”

“Lots of practice,” Okasa offered with a grin.  “But you’ll also notice he’s not downstairs at the moment.  He’s still in bed.  I’ll get him up in another couple of hours and he’ll be good to go until the party’s over.”

“I heard we don’t have quite as many here as we did at Thanksgiving.”  Kent looked at Charisma.  “I’m sorry your friends couldn’t make it.  I really like them.”

Charisma shrugged.  “Me too.  But I don’t blame them for not wanting to make that quick of a turnaround either... especially not with Saphira’s job.”  Charisma turned to Okasa.  “I know Matilda is trying to help them out by giving Saphira as many hours as she can, but....”

“It’s not ours to question, Daughter.  And didn’t you say Saphira worked doubles the entire time Es was out sick?”

“Yes, she did.  But wouldn’t that be a good reason to cut Saphira a little slack now?”

“They may not be able to afford it yet, Charisma.  As sick as Es was purported to be, I imagine that wracked up some pretty hefty medical bills.  And they don’t either one strike me as the type to take charity willingly.”

“No I don’t think they are,” Charisma agreed grudgingly.  She turned back to Kent.  “Where’s your mother, by the way?  Mama said something about London?”

Kent opened his mouth to explain and Okasa just watched them, struck by how independent of one another they appeared to be living their lives.  She secretly wondered if they actually shared anything other than Adam’s parentage.  They did seem to care for one another though, and enjoy each other’s company.  Kent said something wry and made a face, and they laughed.  Charisma put her hand on his shoulder as they continued the conversation and Okasa wondered if Brianna’s leaving had made Charisma decide to put more of an effort into her marriage.  Then they both turned and looked at her with questioning expressions.

“What?”

“That’s what we were wondering,” Charisma replied.  “You were staring at us with the most peculiar countenance.”

“I wasn’t actually looking at anything specific,” Okasa denied.  “I was just thinking.”

“About...?” Kent drawled.

Okasa sighed.  At least she could remind them that they had asked.  “I was just wondering where Brianna was.  Whenever she left before, I always knew where she was going and when she’d be back.  But this time....”

“You know she’ll be back in time for Congress to reconvene – she has to.”

“That’s when she’ll be back in Washington, Charisma.  I don’t think she’s coming back here again.”

“Do you know why she left?” Kent asked, curious beyond words to know what he’d missed in his absence.

“She didn’t say, and I didn’t have the opportunity to ask,” Okasa replied truthfully.  She didn’t add that she was fairly confident what lay behind the defection.  Kent nodded his acceptance of her words.

“I hope she’ll surprise you and come home soon, Okasa.  She seemed like good people to me.  And I won’t forget how she always kept an eye on Adam when he was around.”

About that time, Ame and Adam walked in from the backyard and Adam took off like a shot as soon as he saw Kent.  “PA!” he exclaimed.  Kent knelt down to receive the hug Adam offered, then swooped him up into his arms.

“Brr!!” Kent said, rubbing their noses together.  “You’re cold, Boy!”

“Cold outside, Pa.  Come play?”

“Let me go grab my coat and you can ride the Big Wheel for me, all right?”  Adam nodded wildly, causing laughter to race around the room.  Ame stepped up and took him from Kent.

“I’ll take him potty while you get ready, Mr. Rockwell.  It’s why we came in to begin with.”

“All right.  I’ll be ready in a minute.”  He turned to Charisma.  “You coming?”

“Maybe in a few,” shaking her head.  “You two should have a little father/son time first.”

“Okay... you know where to find us when you’re ready.” 

“I certainly do.”


Chapter LXXV

“Hail!  Hail!  The gang’s all here!” Ruby singsonged when Mal and Indi crossed the threshold together.  They each took a mug of the hot chocolate that Ruby offered them before finding a seat on the floor in the living room where everyone else was gathered.

“Jade is keeping an eye on Kent and Charisma?”  They both nodded and Esmeralda turned to Opal with a smile.  “Who lost the toss?”  Opal chuckled.

“Neither actually.  But since I’m with Brianna during a majority of her waking hours....”

“Fair enough.  All right, the reason I called you all here is because I think you all need to be made aware of what’s happened in that past few days.  It’s very likely this assignment will be ending soon.”  Gasps echoed around the room and the angels looked at one another before everyone’s attention refocused on Esmeralda.

“Are you sure, Es?” Amber asked.  “Have you heard from Him?”

Esmeralda shook her head.  “No.  But the way things have played out, I’m making an educated guess.”  She held up her hand to stop the murmurs and muttering before it started.  “Let me bring you up to date and then you can tell me what you think.”

So she told them – of Kent’s filing for separation papers; of Charisma’s discovery about Brianna’s feelings and her possession of the letters; of Brianna’s defection from the Tagherty’s lives.

“So this is serious then,” Ruby commented.  “It really is the end.  But... then why hasn’t He called us home to file our reports on this case?”

Esmeralda sighed and rubbed her fingers over her forehead before pinching the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger.  “Well, we do still have quite a few loose ends.”  She turned to Amber and Indi. “I noticed the box of letters wasn’t on the coffee table when Saphira and I were there the other day.  What did Charisma do with them?”

Indi shrugged.  “She didn’t touch them when I was with her, but the box was gone two days after she got it from Brianna.  So I don’t know what happened with them exactly.”

“Oh no... I got to watch that bout of craziness,” Amber chimed in drolly, causing laughter to ripple around the room.  Esmeralda sent up another prayer of thanksgiving for Amber.  No matter what they were facing, she always offered a much-appreciated respite from the seriousness that always seemed to surround them, and Esmeralda was grateful.  She gave Amber an indebted smile.

“Would you like to share or would you prefer to suffer in silence?”

Saphira snorted.  “When was the last time she was silent about anything... suffering or not?”  Amber glared at her, then smirked.

“Pot... kettle.  It’s not like we didn’t hear you this morning.”

Saphira blushed but returned the smirk.  “Jealous, much?”

“All right, you two!” Esmeralda said, her own skin the color of a Mr. Lincoln rose.  “Can we get back to the topic at hand, please?”

“Sorry, Es,” Amber muttered.  “I want you to know that I was really glad to hear it.  Aside from the ragging opportunities it gives me,” leering at Saphira who promptly stuck out her tongue, “it’s just really good to know you’re feeling better.”

“It’s really good to feel better too.  However, that still doesn’t tell us what happened to those letters.”

“Oh, that was something.  You know about Okasa’s visit,” waiting for the nod.  “Well, I guess Charisma basically ignored that box the entire day,” waiting for Indi to confirm her words.  “By the time I got there that night, she was back to glaring at it.  She must’ve scowled at that box for over an hour.  Personally I was waiting for it to spontaneously combust.  Honestly the plastic should have at least melted she was staring at it so fiercely.”  Amber shook her head and took a deep breath to continue.

“Finally she crossed over to the table and walked slowly around it several times, still glaring at it.  And then she opened it.”

When Amber didn’t resume her discourse Esmeralda cleared her throat.  “Amber?”

Amber shook her head again.  “It was weird, Es.  Charisma opened that box and froze.  She sat there completely unmoving for the better part of five minutes.  A tear slid slowly down her face – a single tear, Es.  I’m not even sure she was aware of it.  She bit her lip and took a deep breath, and this time when the tears fell they did so quickly and in mass quantities. Charisma wiped her face savagely; I wouldn’t have been surprised to have seen blood follow the action.  She was really rough.  She slammed the lid back on the box and shoved it off the table, like she was trying to make it go away.

Of course everything flew out of it – she hadn’t secured the top and she screamed in reaction.  Seriously, Es – Charisma screamed.  Not words or invectives or epithets – it was more like a howl of frustration.  Then she slammed the box back on the table and began throwing bundles of letters into it.  She didn’t even look at what she was doing – just threw them in haphazardly as she grabbed them from where they scattered.  When she had them all, Charisma slammed the lid back on, only this time she snatched the whole thing off the table and moved it over to the fireplace where she dropped it with such force I expected to see cracks in the brick.

She flipped on the gas – I guess she wasn’t really thinking about the mess that would cause.  I don’t think she would have cared had she considered it.  She was really furious; I could feel the anger radiating off her in waves.  When she had the flames set high enough, she threw the lid to one side and reached into the box.  And then she just... stopped.”

“And then?” when the silence started to drag on.

“She looked at them... really looked. She took them out carefully and examined each bundle.  Okasa had bundled them together by year, and the oldest stacks were by far the thickest.  They decreased considerably after Charisma’s marriage though there were still letters for each of those years as well.”

“Did she open them?”

Amber shook her head.  “No.  She simply reorganized them back into chronological order, then replaced them neatly in the box.  When she was done Charisma took them upstairs and stashed the container in her closet.  Once she was satisfied with their location, she returned downstairs to shut off the fireplace and lock everything up for the night.  She spent most of the rest of my shift that night shifting between glaring at the closet door and staring at the album.  Not the pictures... just the album itself.”

“So the letters are a definite loose end,” Ruby agreed after a few minutes of silence.  “What else is still unresolved?  Aside from the obvious,” she tacked on at the disbelieving glances her words garnered her from the others.  “There has to be more.”

“There is also the issue of Kent’s possession of separation papers.  Just the fact that he had them drawn up makes them a consideration for us.  Even though he has not served them and may never serve them....”  Esmeralda broke off at the sight of Mal shaking her head.  “Mal?”

“I think they are more than a consideration for us at this point, Es.  I’m confident that he will be serving those documents to Charisma – if not soon, then eventually.”

“Even if Brianna is removed from the picture?” Saphira asked before anyone else could speak up.

“Yes.”  Mal paused and pinched her lip thoughtfully.  Then she sighed.  “It’s hard to explain,” holding up a hand to forestall any comments before she could continue.  “Kent has changed since I’ve been assigned to watch over him – grown more serious... more mature, maybe.  He’s spent a lot of time in New York by himself, and it’s brought home some hard truths.”

“He shared these with you?” Ruby asked.

“In a manner of speaking,” Mal replied.  “He was writing a letter to Charisma.”

“Wait – you’re telling me he plans to break up with his wife by writing a ‘Dear Jane’ letter??” Opal nearly screeched.  “Talk about harsh!”

“I don’t think so,” Mal replied, running a nervous hand through her hair.   “I don’t think he plans to write her a ‘Dear Jane’ letter.  I think he was writing out a letter so he could memorize his lines.”

“So he doesn’t forget anything when the time comes to actually break things off with her?”

“Exactly.  He wants her to understand that it’s not Brianna that brought this about – that she was just the missing piece in the puzzle.”  Mal sighed again.  “I should have just stolen the letter and brought it with me so you could see it for yourselves,” she muttered before raising her voice to a normal level again.  “He reminded her that they’ve always been friends but rarely been lovers; that they live completely separate lives even on the occasions when they share a house; that though they love one another they are not and never have been in love with each other; and that the only real thing they have in common anymore is Adam.”

“What does he say about Brianna?”

Mal shook her head.  “He hadn’t gotten very far on that part – only that it was her return to Charisma’s life that showed him how much they were both missing by pretending.  And that they all deserved better than a life of pretense.  Kent wrote that pretense was fine for the stage; that was where it belonged.  But life was meant to be shared and enjoyed, not simply endured.”

“Wow.  He could be a writer with that insight.”

“So what changed?” Turq asked.  “Wait... I get that Brianna returning made him admit this stuff, but the fact is that all the things Mal mentioned have been part of their relationship from the start.  He knew going in that Charisma saw him as more friend than lover and that a big part of the reason they were getting married was to give her a child and him an heir, right?” seeing heads nod thoughtfully around her.  “Okay, so what made him decide to do something about it now?”

Everyone looked at Mal and she shrugged.  “I don’t know.  Maybe he’s found someone else, but I haven’t seen any evidence of that.  Since I’ve been assigned to him, most of his time has been spent at the theatre getting this play off the ground, or going back and forth to spy on Charisma.  He hasn’t really given any indication of an affair.”

“Perhaps his paramour refuses to play second fiddle,” Saphira offered, looking at Esmeralda.  “It would make sense that anyone wanting to really make a life with him would want Kent to resolve things with Charisma first.  Or Kent could even have insisted it be that way,” watching Esmeralda nod her agreement.  “We know he cares for her – I doubt, especially given the letter that Mal overheard him rehearsing, that Kent wants to destroy Charisma’s career with public embarrassment and humiliation.”

“They’re all good possibilities,” Esmeralda agreed giving Saphira a thankful smile.  She turned to Mal.  “Try to keep a lookout; I’m gonna send Jade back with you when you go back to the City with Kent.  I think things are gonna pick up fairly quickly, and it’ll be good for you to have some help there.  Maybe between you both you’ll be able to discover if he has an angle beyond Charisma’s welfare.”

Mal nodded.  “Thanks, Es.”

“Is there anything else that could be considered a loose end?” Amber asked, slumping a little when Esmeralda nodded solemnly.

“Yes, but they are smaller concerns.  We have the Taghertys’ reaction to Brianna’s terminating her contact with them; Kay’s response to Charisma; Charisma’s and Brianna’s return to work....”  She trailed off and the rest sat waiting for her to finish.  When it became apparent that Esmeralda had ended the thought in her head, Saphira prodded her gently.

“Es?  You wanna share with the rest of us?”

“I’m not even sure it’s viable,” Esmeralda confessed, and Saphira waited knowing that Esmeralda was now processing out loud.  Saphira held up a hand to keep the rest from interrupting.  “But I was just thinking... what about those tickets?”

“Tickets?” Saphira repeated.  “I’m not sure I’m following, Es.  What tickets?”

“Six months from now, give or take a week or so, there should be a special delivery made to both Charisma Tagherty and Brianna Walker.  Charisma, unwilling to admit that Brianna’s departure in Barcelona was really goodbye, told Okasa about their plans to revisit Europe together.  Despite her doubts Okasa made the arrangements – the trip is paid for and the tickets purchased.  So unless Okasa has actually canceled things since Brianna’s return to Charisma’s life....”

“I wonder if that’s our deadline,” Ruby mused aloud.  “It would make sense.”

“But we have no real way of knowing,” Jas pointed out.  “So we just....”

“We just keep doing what we’ve been doing.  This is so far out of our hands anymore it’s all we can do.”

************

“Kay... Lee... come in, come in,” Patrick welcomed several days later as he opened the door to his home.  “Everyone else is already here,” motioning them towards the large family room that the children gravitated to naturally.  The kids raced off to join the rest of the crew that were currently bundling up and preparing to head outside to take advantage of the new snow.  Kay looked around carefully and made sure the brood was well protected against the cold before letting them head outdoors.  She smiled when Harley naturally took Adam’s hand with a word of reassurance to Charisma and was thrilled when Michelle automatically took Adam’s other hand instead of Harley’s.

When the children were outside, Kay turned to Patrick though her eyes never left Charisma’s back as she keep her eyes focused on the children outside the window.  Kay lowered her voice.  “Paddy, where’s Brianna?”  Even from the distance Kay felt Charisma’s body stiffen at her low question.

Patrick cleared his throat.  “You may want to talk to Mama about that,” cutting his eyes in Charisma’s direction but keeping his tone level.  Kay drew in a sharp breath and let it out slowly.  Then she nodded her understanding and moved around the room saying her hellos, bypassing Charisma as she made her way out the door and towards the kitchen to find Okasa.

Okasa wasn’t surprised when Kay crossed the threshold.  It was why she’d asked the girls to wait until she called them to come into the kitchen.  She took a deep breath and met Kay’s eyes sorrowfully.

“What happened?”

Okasa shook her head.  “I don’t have the details.  You’ll have to ask Brianna or Charisma to share them.  All I know is that Brianna called me a few days ago and said goodbye,” tears flooding her eyes though she blinked rapidly to prevent them from spilling over.

“Whaddya mean – she said goodbye??  Like....”

“Like she was leaving and wouldn’t be back.”

“Do you know where she went?”

Okasa shook her head again.  “She didn’t say.  She basically indicated that she was severing all ties with us, and that we needed to let her go.  She even removed me from her visitor’s list at her apartment building.”

“Wow... okay.  So why didn’t you call me immediately??”

“And ruin your holiday too?  Kay, there’s nothing you could have done... nothing you can do now.  Brianna would have called you if she’d wanted you to do something, and I’m guessing that she didn’t.  Charisma told me she had been in touch with Esmeralda, but apparently she needs some space from the rest of us.  Because she hasn’t taken any of our calls.”

Kay bit her lip.  “She didn’t take mine either come to think of it.  She returned it, but she didn’t answer when I called her.”

“At least she returned yours,” Okasa said painfully.  “She’s basically excised the entire Tagherty clan from her life.”

“You’re wrong, you know,” Kay said fiercely as she stood a little straighter.  “There is something I can do now.”

“Please don’t,” Okasa asked.  “She’s been through enough.”

Kay snorted.  “She hasn’t been through anything she didn’t bring on herself, Mama O.  And this time she’s dragging us all along with her.  It’s time everyone stops pandering to her and someone sets her straight... so to speak.”

“You really think she’ll take it well from you, Kay?”

“Okasa, I don’t think she’s going to take it well from anyone.  But the fact is I’m about the only one both willing and able to speak on the subject.  I’m not particularly worried about the fallout and I warned her to be careful with Brianna.”

“You did?  When?”  Okasa shook her head.  “Obviously it must have been at Thanksgiving, but how did I miss it?”

“Things were a little hectic around here, Mama O.”

“I guess.  I just....”  Okasa met Kay’s eyes and held them, wanting her to see the truth.  “Kay, I love Brianna like my own, you know that.  But Charisma....”

“Charisma what?” queried a voice from the doorway.  Blue eyes looked between them and flashed anger and something much deeper before she pinned Kay with her stare.  “Charisma what, Mama?”

“Charisma....”

“I think you and I should take this outside, Charisma,” Kay said without missing a beat.  “Get your things and we’ll take a walk.”

“Is that an order?”

“More like a forceful invitation unless you’d prefer to air your dirty laundry to all and sundry here.  And somehow I don’t think you’re ready for that even if your husband isn’t among those present.”

“Leave him out of this!” Charisma said softly from between clenched teeth.

“But of course.  It’s not like he’s a part of much where you’re concerned, is he?  Now fetch your coat.  It’s time we talked.”


Chapter LXXVI

“So I’m guessing this is another one of those traditions that I haven’t been privy to,” Charisma commented once she and Kay were well away from the Tagherty house.  They had left by the front door and made their way down the street towards the neighborhood park in silence.  Charisma had used that time to collect herself.  She released a deep breath and forced herself to relax.

“You could say that,” Kay said as they stepped onto the playground.  “I’ll admit I was a little surprised to see you here,” her voice calm and level.  “I mean, for the better part of twenty years you’ve never been anywhere near here after Christmas.  So why are you here now, Charisma?  Shouldn’t you be somewhere putting in an appearance or...?”

Charisma shrugged.  As furious as she was at Kay for her presumption, she really couldn’t fault her for her concern.  And she appreciated that Kay had the foresight to remove them from the house before beginning their discussion.  Because judging by the look on Kay’s face and the gnawing in Charisma’s belly, this had the potential to get very ugly.  “Kent had to get back to the city – the theatre never stops, you know. So I decided to take a few days off to spend with the family here.  I’ve been so busy running the circuit this recess that I’ve had very little time to just sit and regroup.”  She chuckled lightly.  “Despite everything I miss time with my brothers and their families.”

“So it’s just coincidence that you’re here when Brianna usually joins your family for the holiday?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” bitingly.

“It’s a simple question, Senator.  Why are you getting so defensive about it?”

Charisma stopped walking and whirled to face Kay, her eyes blazing with a myriad of emotions.  “Excuse me??  Just who exactly do you think you are?” feeling her composure fly right out the proverbial window.  “What gives you the right...?”

“I’ll tell you who I am, Senator.  I am the woman who loved Brianna Walker even though it was never enough to exorcise your ghost.  Part of me will always love her, and that part recognizes the importance of your place in her heart and life.  That gives me the right!  The fact that you’ve caused Brianna to leave my family... HER family... gives me the right!”

“MY family.”

“Hers as well, Charisma.  You made her part of it, remember?  And now you’ve taken it away again.”

“Wait just a damn minute!”

“For what, Senator??”  Kay’s voice was a calm, cool counterpoint to Charisma’s heat.  “Are you going to stand there and tell me her leaving wasn’t the direct result of her interaction with you?  Because I know better.  For twenty years you’ve been out of her immediate circle and she’s been part of all of our lives,” motioning around her.  “Then suddenly you’re back and she walks away from everyone... EVERYONE!”  Kay huffed impatiently, then took a deep breath.  “She would never have said goodbye to Mama O if she hadn’t been pushed into it. She’s called the Taghertys family for nearly a quarter century, Charisma – that isn’t something she would have walked away from voluntarily.”

“So of course it has to be my fault!  She bears no responsibility at all for her actions.  Is that what you’re telling me??”

“Of course she bears responsibility for her actions... but only some of it.  Some of the responsibility and blame for this fiasco lies squarely on your shoulders, Senator, and it’s high time you faced up to that fact!  You’re both culpable here!”

Charisma narrowed her eyes.  “You’ve got a lot of nerve.”

Kay shoved her clenched hands into her pockets to keep from doing something monumentally stupid... like shake some sense into a deliberately obtuse United States Senator.  She couldn’t remember the last time she had struggled so hard to maintain her sense of self-control.  Another deep breath and she spoke calmly again.  “I’m going to say something to you, Charisma, and you’re going to listen.  What you do with the information after that is your own business, but I’m going to tell you something that no one else... not even Brianna... is willing to say to you because no one wants to put you on the spot or make you uncomfortable or hurt your feelings.”  Kay cocked her head and regarded Charisma steadily, not surprised to see anger and contempt as the chief emotions reflected back at her.  But it was Kay’s job to read people, and she could see so much more in Charisma’s eyes.  She saw pain and fear and longing, and Kay had to wonder how Charisma could deny such strong emotions.  Brown eyes held blue for a long moment and Kay could see Charisma’s desire to squirm, but she held firm.

“But you’d take great delight in that wouldn’t you, Dr. Williams?”  Charisma’s words and tone were biting and she steadfastly refused to refer to Kay more familiarly.  Kay tilted her head and regarded Charisma thoughtfully.

“Why do you think that, Senator?” offering Charisma the same professional courtesy that had been extended to her, though for different reasons.  “Wait,” holding up a hand.  “I want you to really think about your answer.  I want to know why you believe I would get some sort of perverse pleasure out of seeing you in pain.”

“Not just seeing,” Charisma spat.

Kay’s eyes widened.  “You think I like causing you pain?”

“You already said as much,” Charisma said, her timbre suddenly flat and without the slightest hint of inflection.

“No,” Kay disputed.  “That’s not what I said at all.”  She looked around and spotted a snow-covered bench set under some denuded trees.  She gestured with her head.  “Would you like to walk around the park or shall we sit for this conversation?  I think it’s safe to say we’re not going to be overheard or interrupted either way,” holding her hand out to catch the snowflakes that had just begun to fall.

“I’m fairly certain my wants aren’t going to figure into this at all.  We might as well walk; at least we’ll be warmer.”  Kay nodded and they set off across the cleared path.

Silence reigned again for a few moments as Kay gathered her thoughts once more.  Charisma stayed quiet, refusing to start a discussion she didn’t even want to have.  The only reason she hadn’t left was because she was confident that this woman... this doctor... would follow her to Washington to have this conversation if need be.  And as much as she had no desire to hear or interest in hearing what Kay had to say, she wanted her saying it in Washington even less.  That town had ears everywhere, and Charisma had the distinct impression that whatever Kay had to say, it was not meant for public consumption.  Finally Kay took a deep breath and started to speak.

“First of all – my goal here is not to cause you pain, Charisma.  My goal is to be completely honest with you... something everyone around you is afraid to do because they want to protect you even if it’s from yourself.  Please let me finish,” Kay requested.  “I promise I will listen to any rebuttal you would like to make or answer whatever questions you have when I’m done.”  Charisma clamped her lips together and nodded, crossing her arms over her chest and waiting.

“Thank you.  Charisma – you’re already in pain.  You have been for a very long time... probably since Brianna first left and you realized she wasn’t coming back to you.”  Kay shook her head.  “You’ve been in pain so long it’s become the norm for you; it’s one reason you’re holding onto it so tightly.  It’s been your most faithful companion.”

“What would you know about it?” Charisma grumbled quietly as though to herself.   Kay smiled sadly.

“I do this for a living, Charisma; I see other peoples’ pain every day.  But your pain is familiar to me.  For as long as I’ve known her I’ve seen your pain reflected in the eyes of one I love.”  Kay waited, but Charisma remained silent and she recognized that Charisma was making an effort to abide by their earlier pact.  “Charisma, I want you to be honest with yourself and honest with me.  There’s no one here to hear us, and everything you say to me will be held in the strictest confidence of doctor/patient privilege.  No one - not Okasa, not Kent and not Brianna – no one will know what is said between us unless you decide to share it.”

“Even though you’re not actually my doctor?”

“Even then – I take my oath very seriously, Charisma.”  Charisma held Kay’s eyes a long moment, then nodded and gestured for her to continue.  “How do you feel about Brianna Walker, Charisma?”

“I love her,” through clenched teeth.  “She’s my best friend.”

“That’s all?”

“Isn’t that enough?”

“Completely honest, Charisma.  You hate her a little bit too, don’t you?  For putting you into this position – for leaving you alone and forcing you to live without her despite everything.”

“NO!”  A beat.  “Yes,” in a much more subdued tone.  “I just....”  Charisma uncrossed her arms and jammed her hands into her pockets so hard Kay fully expected to see them come clean through the material.  She waited, but Charisma didn’t say anything else.  She merely compressed her lips together a little tighter than before.  Kay sighed.

“I’m going to tell you some things, Charisma – some truths that I think you know but are unwilling to face.  It’s probably going to hurt you to hear them, but they need to be said.”

“No.”

“Excuse me?”

“No, they don’t need to be said.”

“I think they do.  The only way you’re going to purge the pain you’ve carried with you for twenty years... the only way you’re going to find real happiness and a measure of peace... is to lance the wound that is still festering in your heart.”

“You can’t make me listen.”

Kay shook her head.  “No, I really can’t.  But I think you know how much you need to, and part of you wants to believe I can do something... anything... to make things better.”

“Why do you care?”

“Excuse me?” Kay repeated, wondering how she’d lost control of the conversation again.  Her mental lips twitched.  It reminded her very much of some discussions she and Brianna had shared; some of them about the woman now glaring at her like she was a two-headed gorgon.

“I said....”

“I heard you, Charisma.  Why would you think I wouldn’t care?  Despite the fact that you and I started on the wrong foot because of who I am and who I’ve been in Brianna’s life, I really don’t get off on inflicting pain or watching people around me suffer if I can do something about it.  And I care about you by extension because you’re important to Brianna.”

“So you’re doing this for Brianna.”

“I’m doing this for you,” Kay replied with a hint of exasperation.  “If it helps Brianna, that’s a bonus I can live with.”

“I really don’t like you very much.”

“I know.  Jealousy’s a hard thing to overcome.”

“I’m not....”

“Yes, you are, Charisma.  Complete honesty, remember?  You don’t just love her... you’re in love with her.  And it galls you that Brianna and I were lovers; it just incenses you to know that I have touched her in ecstasy; tasted her passion; heard her cry out her pleasure....”

“THAT’S ENOUGH!!!”

“Why?” Kay asked reasonably.  “It’s the truth, Charisma.  You can’t stand that I’ve had what you so desperately want.  That red-hot burning you feel in your veins right now?  That’s pure, unadulterated jealousy.”

Charisma scoffed though her eyes told a different story as did her clenched fists.  Kay wondered how much more she’d have to push before Charisma took a swing.  “Why would I be jealous of you and Brianna as a couple?   All I ever wanted for her was happiness.”

“LIAR!” wanting to snort when Charisma’s eyes widened.  “You wanted her happiness WITH YOU.”

Wide blue eyes narrowed until Charisma was glaring.  “Excuse me??  Just because you couldn’t make Brianna happy....”

“I did,” Kay stated unequivocally.  “We were happy; but neither of us was willing to live with your ghost in the middle of our relationship.  However, this isn’t about me making Brianna happy except as it infuriates you. Because it does, doesn’t it?  It’s driving you crazy to stand there and pretend indifference to the fact that I’ve had the one thing in life you really want – the one you could have had if you hadn’t denied the truth of your heart....”

Whatever else Kay was going to say was cut off by the stinging slap across her face that Charisma delivered with the flat of her palm.

“That’s enough.” Charisma’s voice was pure ice now.

“That was your one free shot, Charisma.  Do you feel better now?” Kay asked calmly as she shook her head and wiped a drop of blood from the corner of her lip.  “Hitting me doesn’t change the fact that you are as in love with Brianna Walker as she is with you and always have been.”

“That’s enough.”

“Nor does it change the fact that you are too much of a coward to do anything about it.”

“That’s. Enough.”  This time the sound was emitted through clenched teeth and was as sharp as glass.  Kay was tempted to look for bleeding wounds, but she refused to give Charisma any quarter – not when she was this close to a breakthrough.

“How does it feel, Charisma?  Knowing you could have everything you ever wanted – knowing you could be truly happy – and being unwilling to make it happen.  You’re a selfish woman, Charisma, and nothing but a coward.  Personally I think Brianna is better off without you in her life.”

“THAT’S ENOUGH!!!”

Kay was ready when Charisma swung this time, catching her arm in the palm of her hand and using Charisma’s own momentum to turn her until she was standing with her back to Kay’s front.

“Let me go,” Charisma growled, struggling to free herself from Kay’s grasp.

“No.”  Kay shook her head firmly.

“I am a United States Senator!  I demand you release me at once.”

“You could get free if you really wanted me to let you go.”  Kay felt the fight flow out of Charisma’s body, but she made no effort to pull away from Charisma and noticed Charisma was doing nothing to escape her clasp either.  “You’re a woman in pain, Charisma.  There’s no shame in needing someone even if that person is someone you really don’t want to need.”

“I don’t need you, Kay Williams,” Charisma whispered.  “And I can’t need her.”

Finally, Kay thought.  Finally we’re getting somewhere.  “Why, Charisma?  Why can’t you need her?”

Kay felt Charisma slump a little further, and she tightened her grip to keep them from sinking to the snow-covered ground.  The paths that had been shoveled already had a light dusting of new snow and she had no desire to try and melt it.

“Please let me go.”

Kay relaxed her arms and Charisma stepped out of her embrace and wrapped her arms around herself.  She kept her back to Kay, and Kay tried to respect that to a degree.  It didn’t mean she was going to stop pushing.

“Talk to me, Charisma.  Why can’t you need Brianna?”

Charisma snorted.  “I know my family seems to think a lot of you so you can’t possibly be as stupid as you sound right now.  But just in case you need a refresher, let me spell it out for you, okay?  I am a United States Senator, and because of that people expect certain things from me.  Like a husband and children though in my case it will only be one child... singular.  They expect....”

“Well, that’s your first problem, Charisma.  You probably need to come out of that ivory tower you’re living in.  Maybe you should stop trying to live to other peoples’ expectations; none of your colleagues do, or are you really that naïve??  Stop,” Kay commanded with an upraised hand when Charisma whirled around to respond to her.  “You know the kind of bullshit that goes on in those ‘hallowed halls’,” her tone mocking and derisive.  “It’s good to have standards, Charisma.  Just make sure they’re your own and not everyone else’s expectations.”

“And what about my family?” facing away from Kay again.

Kay shrugged, even though Charisma couldn’t see it.  “What about them?  C’mon, Charisma... do you really think they don’t know... that they haven’t known for years?  They knew before you did; certainly long before you ever considered it to be more than a passing fancy.  It’s one reason they welcomed Brianna into the fold so easily.  Then they did it because they liked her for herself.  Even Kent....”

Charisma whirled and raised clenched fists before slamming them to her sides.  “Even Kent what??”

“Charisma, Kent is not a stupid man.  If he doesn’t already know, I’d be amazed.  You weren’t exactly subtle at Thanksgiving.”

“We didn’t DO anything at Thanksgiving.”

“You didn’t have to, Charisma.  It’s simply part and parcel of who you are together.”  Kay hesitated, then straightened.  “You don’t have to accept it, Charisma.  You can spend the next twenty years in the same kind of denial and uber contentment that you’ve lived the last twenty years in.  No one but me is going to call you on your behavior and I won’t bring it up again.  Because it’s your choice and your life.”  She took a deep breath.  “But you have a chance for real, genuine happiness and more than just you would benefit if you choose correctly.  You just have to be brave enough to love the one who holds your heart and always has.”  Kay walked towards Charisma until they were standing side-by-side though they both kept their focus distant.  “Question is – can you live with yourself if you choose to be happy instead of keeping a code that you don’t even really believe in?”  Without another word Kay walked off the playground and headed back towards the Taghertys.  She stopped when she reached the tree where Hunter was waiting.

“Are you all right?” he asked.  “I saw her swing, but you shook your head so I....”

“You did the right thing.  I’m fine.  But you may want to stay here and keep an eye on her... just in case.  I’ll send someone down to give you a break in a few minutes.”

Hunter shook his head.  “Just send some coffee.  I’ll be all right.  It’ll be like a stakeout.”  Kay smiled and nodded, then turned to walk away.  Hunter clasped her hand.  “Thanks, Kay.  Thanks for caring enough to say something to her.”

“I was the only one that could,” she reminded him, then walked back to the warmth of the house.


Chapter LXXVII

“So what happened after Kay said her piece, Indi?” Esmeralda asked.  Indi had requested to speak to her alone, and Esmeralda had to wonder what had caused her to make such an unusual demand.  One of the things the other angels seemed to appreciate about Esmeralda’s management style was her willingness to share information and let everyone see the big picture.  It had made her one of the most successful guardians to date.  So she was more than a little intrigued by Indigo’s petition.

Indi shook her head and sighed.  “I’m not... I mean... Charisma’s acting weird.”

Esmeralda blinked.  “I’m going to guess that’s not a good thing.”

Indi shrugged.  “You tell me.  After Kay left the playground, Hunter kept an eye on Charisma until Forrest arrived.  She was just sitting there not moving; I’m still not sure what she was focused on.  I’m not even sure she noticed her brothers until they actually made physical contact with her.  Together they got Charisma wrapped in the blanket Okasa sent and got her back to the Tagherty homestead.  The only people still there were Rocky, Okasa and Patrick.  Even Adam was gone as Ame had gone with the wives and the Williams’ and taken all the kids to Chuck E. Cheese.”

“Okay, so what happened?”

“Nothing,” Indi growled in disgust.  “Okasa took Charisma upstairs – settled her into a bath to warm her up and when she went in to check on her, Charisma was tucked into bed asleep.  This morning Charisma was gone.  She left a note for Ame telling her to bring Adam home tomorrow.  He’s been having so much fun playing with his cousins that Charisma didn’t want to take him away from that any sooner than necessary.”

“Did she speak to Okasa before she left?”

Indi shook her head.  “She wrote her a note as well.  But it was kind of vague and awkward... almost stilted.  Like she really didn’t know what to say anymore or how to say it.  She thanked her for the holiday and for looking after Adam and expressed a desire to see them again in the near future.”

Esmeralda’s brows rose into her hairline.  “Are you serious?  She wrote a perfunctory, polite hostess note to her mother??”

“Pretty much.  Okasa was cool about it; she just picked up the phone and called Charisma.  When the call went to voicemail, she called Kay to find out about what happened with Charisma in the park.  She wasn’t happy with the fact the Kay refused to share what her conversation with Charisma entailed, but Okasa stopped badgering her when Kay claimed confidentiality.  Okasa then explained her concern over Charisma’s discombobulation and Kay assured her it was to be expected.”

Esmeralda nodded her head slowly.  “So why’d you want to tell me this in private, Indi?  You know my policy on keeping everyone in the loop.”

“I do, but I thought you might want a chance to digest this alone first.  I know everyone basically thinks this mission is over and that we failed our task to bring them together.”

“But you don’t.”

“After yesterday I think we’ve just gotten to the beginning of the end.  There’s so much in play right now... especially after everything that Kay said to Charisma.  I think Kay may be the key to this thing getting resolved positively because she’s pushed Charisma out of her comfort zone in Egypt and right into a state of awareness that Charisma is completely unfamiliar with.”  Indi sighed.  “I just don’t think we’re going to get called home straight away.”

“I’m inclined to agree,” Esmeralda said with a slow nod.  “Thanks, Indi.  I appreciate the consideration.  I will probably ask you to share everything you just shared with me again.

“I know,” Indi smiled.  “But at least you won’t be taken by surprise by it.”  A knock on the door brought their heads around just as Saphira stuck her head in.

“Everything all right?” looking between them before meeting Esmeralda’s eyes.  Esmeralda smiled and nodded even as she held out a hand to Saphira.  Saphira accepted it and lifted it to her lips to brush a kiss over the knuckles.  “Opal’s here – Brianna just got back into town.”

“I’ll just....”  Indi motioned towards the living room and headed out, closing the door behind her softly.  Saphira cocked an eyebrow in Esmeralda’s direction.

“Was it something I said?”

“I think our loose ends have started tying up a lot faster than we expected.”  Before she could elaborate, a knock sounded on the door again and Ruby poked her head in.

“Es?  You’re gonna wanna come out here.  Mal just arrived.”

Saphira and Esmeralda exchanged glances.  “Never rains but it pours,” Saphira muttered and tugged Esmeralda to her feet so they could go hear the next part of the saga they were enmeshed in.

************

“Well, Brianna’s demeanor is in complete contrast to Charisma’s,” Opal offered when Indi was done sharing Charisma’s story.  “She spent her holiday relaxing – daily massages, meditation, relaxation therapy even.  She did some writing as well.  Otherwise she took advantage of the fact that she was in Dubai sightseeing and such.”  Opal turned and looked at Esmeralda with a smile.  “I’m pretty sure you’ll be seeing new pictures grace her walls in the next few weeks.  She took a lot of them.”

“Do you think she’s over Charisma?”

Opal snorted.  “I don’t think Brianna will ever be over Charisma.  But I do think she’s moved beyond her - not far, but she’s taken the first step to putting Charisma in her past.”

“Of course,” Saphira griped.  “Somebody finally switches on a light in the darkness of denial that Charisma’s been walking around in for years, and Brianna decides to move on.”  She looked at Opal.  “Can I ask what her step was?”  At Opal’s confounded look, Saphira sighed and rubbed her forehead.  “You said she took the first step to putting Charisma in her past,” waiting for Opal to nod.  “What did she do that you considered her first step?”

“She deleted the email Charisma sent her, then purged her computer of all the pictures she had of her and Charisma together.”

“Does she still have the album?”

“To my knowledge.”

“Still that’s a pretty big first step.  She’s had those pictures on every computer she’s had the last twenty years.  And we know she wanted a copy of that photograph Charisma sent her; she specifically asked for it.”  Esmeralda turned her head to one side and let her eyes center on nothing in particular while she pinched her bottom lip thoughtfully.  Everyone else remained respectfully silent, waiting for her focus to return to them.  Finally Esmeralda sighed and looked at Mal.  “Talk to me, Mal.  What brings you back to DC again so soon?”

“Kent.”  She turned to Indi.  “Are you sure he wasn’t at the Tagherty’s when Kay confronted Charisma?  Maybe he snuck back when Jade and I weren’t looking??”

“Absolutely.  He left on Christmas night; he was there just short of two days.  You know that – you left when he did.  There is no way the three of us could have missed him coming back to the Tagherty’s for any reason.”

“Why?  What happened?” Esmeralda broke the tableau between Indi and Mal.

“I don’t know.  That’s what makes me think I missed something significant.”  Mal scrubbed a hand over her face and into her hair.  “This morning Kent called his lawyer and requested those papers.  Then he called to ask Charisma to give him some time on Sunday.”

“You think he knows what went down between Charisma and Kay the other day?”

“Not unless he’s more clairvoyant than all of us combined,” Mal said with a shake of her head.  “And unless he’s got some sort of undercover operative we know nothing about, I’m not sure how he could have heard about it either.”

“He may not have needed to.”

“Es?”

Esmeralda’s comment and Saphira’s follow-up question turned all heads in Esmeralda’s direction.  She bit her lip, then took a deep breath.  “I think we can all agree that Kent Rockwell isn’t a stupid man, correct?  Despite his easy going attitude, he’s a pretty sensitive guy, right?”  She waited for everyone to nod their agreement.  “So why is it so hard to believe that he couldn’t pick up the difference in Charisma’s behavior from Thanksgiving to Christmas?”

“You think...?”

“Let’s consider the things we know – he’s been coming back to Washington to spy on Charisma, for lack of a better term, because he recognized something different about her when Brianna Walker came back into her life.  He’s seen them together in Charisma’s home here and he’s seen them at the Tagherty’s with the entire family.  While nothing inappropriate has happened at either location, Kent has identified a distinct difference in Charisma’s attitude and behavior in the last few months... especially where Brianna is concerned.  And he’s also been made aware of just how integral to the entire Tagherty clan Brianna has been for years.”  Esmeralda paused and took a deep breath.

“Now put that together with the woman he’s always known – the woman he agreed to marry and have a child with.  The same woman who was at the Tagherty’s for Christmas because she knew Brianna was essentially lost to her again.  It doesn’t take a genius to come up with the correct answer.”

“So Charisma’s life is falling down around her ears?”

“Basically yes.  The moment Brianna Walker stepped back into her life everything started unraveling for Charisma Tagherty.  All that remains to be seen is if it’s going to be too little, too late.”

“I hate this job,” Saphira muttered though it was loud enough for everyone in the room to hear it.

Esmeralda gently squeezed her hand.  “Sometimes we all do, Love.”  She turned back to the waiting angels.  “All right – everyone back to their posts for now.  If and when things change again....”

“We’ll just sit back and watch it happen,” Saphira said with little inflection in her voice.  She met Esmeralda’s chiding eyes.  “It’s the truth and you know it.  We’re observers at this point.  There’s not much that you or anyone else can do to influence the way things go.”

“Perhaps,” Esmeralda conceded.  “But that doesn’t mean we can be lax in our vigilance.  So keep your eyes peeled, ladies.  Things should be moving fairly quickly from here on out.”

“I guess that means I better get to bed,” Ruby stated with a groan.  “If we’re still working here, I have to be up early to be at the diner tomorrow.”

“Us too,” Opal said, motioning between her and Indi.  “Not for the diner, but the Senators are working through the weekend so we are too.  Everyone wants to greet the new session running apparently.”  She looked at Indi.  “Are you going to be at the office or...?”

Indi shrugged.  “We’re starting out in the apartment.  That’s where we’re meeting anyway.  After that?  I guess it depends on how work goes.  You?”

“We’ll be working from Charisma’s house.  We’ve done it enough that we’ve got it down to a science even with Adam there.  We won’t go into the office in the Senate Building until Congress recommences after the weekend.”

With that the meeting broke up and goodnights were bidden as angels scattered to resume their duties... and in some cases, their beds.  They all had a feeling they were going to need the rest to get through the upcoming days.

************

They worked for several straight days just like they would in Senate office but with the added benefit of casual clothes.  Neither Charisma nor Brianna objected to their staff adopting a more informal mode of dress while working the last few days of the holiday.  Brianna was as relaxed as she had ever been with her staff, but Indi could clearly see the shadows and shutters in green eyes that had once been clear and open.  Still Brianna was brisk and professional so Indi had no opportunity to ask after her boss in more than a cursory manner.

Even Esmeralda was unsuccessful in prying much from the brief conversations she shared with Brianna.  She was desperately hoping that a return to the office might also mean a return to more personal and friendly discussion.  For now Esmeralda counted her blessings that both of her friends had deemed staying in touch with her was a priority for them.  At least she had contact with them on an almost daily basis, and in another few days it would be daily as well as face-to-face.

Charisma, on the other hand, was at times short and at others longsuffering.  Her staff didn’t know from minute to minute which boss they might encounter.  It made work difficult at best and Opal came home so exhausted she simply fell into bed face first.  Esmeralda recognized the signs and putting those with the brief conversations she was having with Charisma, let Opal sleep for a while before waking her for dinner and a short debriefing before tucking her back into bed.

By the time Sunday arrived, Esmeralda decided to give Opal the chance to sleep in a bit, and Amber, Mal and Jade stayed with Charisma and Kent to watch the drama unfold between them.

************

Charisma frowned when the doorbell rang.  She hadn’t opened the gates yet this morning because she wasn’t expecting anyone but Kent this early.  And of course Kent had a key.  Still it was possible he’d forgotten it; hence she rose from her desk and walked into the foyer.  She wasn’t surprised to see him standing on the steps when she looked through the peephole and therefore had the alarm shut off before she’d hardly stopped walking.

She opened the door with a smile – which wavered when she realized Kent wasn’t smiling back at her.  She motioned him in with a question.  “Kent?  Is something wrong?  Did you forget your key?”

“Yes,” he replied calmly.  “And no.”

Charisma frowned.  It was too damned early in the morning for riddles and games.  She’d promised to give Kent the morning, but there was still work to be done before the day was done.  She didn’t want to start off being confused by vagueness. 

“I’m sorry... yes and no what?”

“Yes, there is something wrong.   I think there has been for a while.  And no, I didn’t forget my key.”

“Then why were you knocking?”

Kent sighed.  Leave it to Charisma to jump right into things before they even said hello to one another.  “Can we go into the kitchen?  This will probably take a few minutes, and I’d like a cup of coffee.”

“Of course!” Charisma exclaimed, mentally thumping herself on the head.  “Let me take your coat, and we’ll get you squared away.”

Kent handed over his overcoat though he kept his sports coat on.  Charisma shooed him towards the kitchen and he hesitated just long enough to see her head to her office to close the door before he disappeared across the threshold.  She was only a minute behind him and she walked into the kitchen carrying a half-empty cup of coffee. 

“Did you get your coffee?” frowning again when she realized he didn’t have a cup in front of him.

“I thought I’d wait for you,” Kent responded though that was only a half-truth.  Charisma nodded and pulled out his usual mug, and his smile was melancholy as he grasped she knew at least that much about him.  She prepared his coffee and set it in front of him, then took a seat next to him at the table.

“So what’s going on?” Charisma asked bluntly.  “I know something is bothering you.”

“Do you, Charisma?  How can you be sure?”  This time her frown was more of a glower as she tried to make sense of what Kent was implying.  Coming up empty she shook her head and Kent sighed.  “You’re right, Charisma – something is bothering me and has been for a while.  And since we’re heading into a new year and all....”

“Kent, we’ve already started the New Year... several days ago.”

“I’m well aware, Charisma,” Kent replied wryly.  “I was standing above Times’ Square when the ball dropped.  However this was the first time this year that you and I could be in the same place together so work with me here, all right?” with just a hint of exasperation.  Charisma nodded, wondering at his vehemence.  “Thank you,” he muttered.  “I wanted to give these to you myself personally,” he added, pulling a sheaf of legal papers from the inside of his jacket.  Charisma hesitated, then took them from him gingerly as though gentle handling would change the contents of the documents themselves.

She opened them slowly and let her eyes read though them twice.  When she looked up to meet his eyes she found Kent looking at her – not with pity or hatred or anger but with love and respect.  She felt her anger drain away leaving only confusion in its wake.

“Why?”

Kent cleared his throat but held her gaze without flinching.  “When we married I knew you didn’t love me like you could.  But you did love me after a fashion and we were good together.  And since we were friends and we both wanted a child, I didn’t see any reason for us not to get married.  It fit into your career goals and it made your mother happy so what could be wrong with it, right?  And I didn’t mind because it gave me the opportunity to have a child and made my mother happy as well, with the added bonus that she stopped bugging me about needing a legal heir once Adam was born.”

“What changed?”

“You did – or perhaps I should say that we didn’t.  We never became more than good friends.  We’ve never really shared our lives... only our living space.  The truth is that we’ve never been much more than roommates with occasional and very rare conjugal visits.  You’re still one of my very best friends, Charisma, and I still love you.  But I’m not in love with you anymore than you’re in love with me.”  Kent paused.  “If I’d known the truth of your heart years ago when you asked me to marry you, I’d have never said yes.  It’s not fair to you; it’s not fair to me; and it’s not fair to her.”

“Who?” Charisma asked in a hoarse voice, unable to meet his eyes now.  Kent reached across the table and tilted Charisma’s chin up until she met his eyes.

“I’m not stupid, Charisma – please don’t insult my intelligence.  Even a blind man can see that Brianna Walker is the person in your heart - still I’d say, because if I was a betting man I’d say she’s been there for a long, long time.”

“So why a separation?” Charisma asked, shaking the papers slightly.  “Why not a divorce?”

“I want you to make the final decision – whether this is a trial separation that will see us together as a couple at the end of it or whether we will go our separate ways on a permanent basis.  I want you to take this time and think about things, Charisma... about everything.  If I’m wrong, then when this trial separation is over we need to figure out how to become a real husband and wife... a real family.  But if I’m right, I want you to use this time to be honest with everyone concerned – yourself, Brianna and me.  The only thing I ask is that you don’t restrict my access to Adam.  He’s the best part of us, and I don’t want to miss any time with him that I can have.”

“Of course not,” Charisma agreed immediately.  “You are and will always be his father.”  She took a deep breath but kept her eyes on the papers as she refolded them neatly.  Then she met his eyes.  “May I ask why you are so calm and rational about this?”

Kent chuckled though it was tinged with a hint of sadness.  “I’ve had a while to come to terms with this, Charisma.  Besides, like I said – you’re one of my best friends and the mother of my son.  I’d like to see you happy.  And I think Brianna Walker can do that.”

“And will it make you happy, Kent?  If we’re no longer together?”

Kent hesitated, then nodded.  “It will give me the chance to find a love like you have with her.  Who knows?  Maybe I’ll get lucky too.”

Charisma nodded and rose to refill her coffee cup.  “Stay a little while.  Ame will be back with Adam shortly, and he’s anxious to see you.  We’ll be working in my office so you can have the whole afternoon with him if you like.”

“I’d like very much,” Kent said.  “Thank you, Charisma.”

She whirled on him.  “For what?”

“Understanding.”  She frowned at him but nodded.  Then they settled in to wait for Adam’s return.


Chapter LXXVIII

“PA!!!” Adam squealed and the sound brought up the heads of everyone working in Charisma’s study and a sorrowful smile to Charisma’s face though no one commented.  Instead after a brief moment they returned to their work, and Charisma nodded her head in approval as she refocused herself.  In another moment there was a knock at the door of the study, and Kent and Adam poked their heads in gingerly.  “Charisma?”

Again everyone glanced up, but this time it was so brief Charisma barely had time to notice before they had once more been occupied with other things.  Charisma rose from her seat and motioned them back out of her office.  “Sorry,” she offered.  “We’ve got paper scattered everywhere.  I’d really rather not....” motioning to Adam currently ensconced in his father’s arms.  Kent waved away her explanation.

“Don’t worry about it, Charisma.  That room has always been sacred – I know that.  Listen, would you mind if Adam and I went over to the Mall for a bit?  Maybe took in a museum?”

“Kent, he’s your son too; you don’t need my permission.”

Kent shrugged.  “Maybe.  But I didn’t want you to worry when it got quiet around here.  We won’t be too long.  It’s still pretty cold out and we don’t want Adam catching a chill, do we Boy?” chuckling when Adam vigorously shook his head no.  “I thought maybe I could bring pizza back for dinner before I headed off too?” his offer sounding more like a question than a statement.

Charisma nodded.  “That would be fine but only get enough for the three of us.  I’m going to let these guys go home in a little while.”

“Okay – I’ll call you before we head back.  You can call the pizza order in.”

Charisma smirked.  “I should have known there’d be a catch.  All right – you let me know and I’ll make the call.”  Without another word she turned and re-entered her study and Kent and Adam got dressed to spend some time in the frigid outdoors.

************

Brianna was sitting on a bench outside the National Gallery when she heard the voice, and she dropped her head and took a deep breath to prepare herself for what was coming.  She was more than a little surprised when she looked up and met Kent Rockwell’s eyes briefly before finding herself with an armful of Adam Rockwell as he shouted her name.

“BR’ANNA!!” patting her face gently.  “Love Br’anna... Br’anna good.”

“Hey, Little Man,” she greeted with a sad smile, glad for the wind that was blowing.  She could blame the tears stinging her eyes on that.  Adam cradled her face in his hands and rubbed their noses together even as he laughed aloud.

“Love Br’anna,” he said again, then snuggled up under her chin.  Brianna kissed the top of his head.

“Love you too, Little Man.”  She turned her attention to Kent who stood by with his hands shoved in his pockets, rocking on his heels awkwardly.  She nodded to the empty space on the bench beside her even as he spoke.

“May I join you?”

“Please,” Brianna responded immediately, waiting until he was settled before speaking again.  “This was quite a surprise.  I didn’t expect to see anyone out here today.”

Kent snickered.  “There are always tourists except in the very rare event when the museums are closed.  I have to admit that I was equally stunned to see you here.  I thought everyone was working today in preparation for the new session.”

“I worked most of the last four days; that’s enough.”

Kent held up his hands in surrender.  “No argument from me.  I just know how most of the people in your position tend to work.  There are only two speeds – really fast and not at all.”  He snorted.  “Most of them wouldn’t be caught dead going to the Smithsonian even if it wasn’t the dead of winter.”

“I’m not remotely like most of the people who work in this business,” with a wry smile.  “Remember, this is a temporary assignment for me.  I’m not making plans to do this long-term.”

“That’s true,” Kent conceded, marveling at her stage presence.  He knew she was uncomfortable with him and yet aside from a bit of stiffness that could be marked down to the fact that Adam was wrapped around her like an octopus, he never would have guessed from her demeanor.  Before he could pursue his line of thinking however, Brianna’s voice broke into his thoughts.

“So what brings you boys out to the Mall on this bright, blustery winter’s day?”

“The dinosaurs,” nodding his head in the direction of the Natural History Museum.  “You?”

“The sculpture of Diana.  I find it inspiring.”

“So you were out here instead of in there because...?”

“It was a little warm in the Gallery,” Brianna admitted after a moment’s hesitation.  “The heat is turned up because it’s so cold out here.  But when you’re dressed for the weather out here, it doesn’t take long to become overheated in there.”

Kent nodded seriously.  “I can see how that could quickly become something of an issue.  Just don’t catch a chill sitting out here too long.  That would be the same problem in reverse.”  He drew a deep breath.  “Speaking of... I’d better get us indoors.  I don’t want Adam getting sick out here.”

“There’s just one problem,” Brianna responded softly.  Kent cocked his head and waited.  “He’s asleep.”

“Oh.  Oh dear.  I didn’t... I’m so sorry.”

“Why?” Brianna asked with a hint of amusement in her tone.  “He was tired.  Obviously you’ve already had a busy day together.  I’m flattered he feels comfortable enough with me to fall asleep when I’m holding him.”

“You must have a special kind of magic,” Kent commented with a smile.  “He really doesn’t trust very many to do that on,” not mentioning his own difficulties right after Adam’s birth.  He rose and turned to Brianna, tilting his head trying to figure out the best way to take his son out of her arms without being inappropriate.  Brianna returned his look and held up a finger.

Without much effort she stood and waited for Kent to extend his arms.  She deposited Adam gently into the cradle Kent formed for him, then leaned forward and kissed Adam’s cheek.  Adam sighed and cuddled deeper into his father’s embrace.  Brianna gave Kent a lopsided smile.

“You may want to rethink that visit to the museum,” she suggested with a twinkle.  “Not sure how much he’d get out of it in his current condition.”

Kent chuckled.  “You could be right.  It was nice seeing you again, Brianna.”

“You too, Kent.  Take care,” she said as she turned and walked away without a backwards glance.

************

“Thank you for coming, Turq,” Kent said as she settled in behind the wheel of the big car.  She met his eyes in the rearview mirror.

“It’s not a problem, Mr. Rockwell.”

“Just for the record, I normally don’t do this.  But I wasn’t sure how I was going to get home on the Metro carrying Adam and pizza.”

“I know, sir.  It’s really not a problem.  Would you like me to fetch the pizza or watch Adam for you?”

He glanced down at Adam who was still sleeping with his head in Kent’s lap, then jerked his head at the pizza joint.  “Would you mind?”

“Not at all, sir,” accepting the money he passed her.  “Be right back.”

True to her word, it only took a few minutes and she was back asking for more money.  “I’m sorry, sir.  Evidently the Senator ordered more than one because of your unexpectedly early return.”  Kent simply nodded and handed over a wad of bills.  In short order they were headed back to Charisma’s house with the pizzas in hand. 

Charisma had the gate opened waiting on them, and Turq pulled into the driveway without hesitation.  When she reached the portico she pulled up to the door before shutting the car off.  Then she raced around to open the door for Kent who had scooped Adam into his arms once more.  Before Turq could ask Kent for his keys to unlock the door for him, Charisma pulled the door open wide and motioned him in.

“Kent?  Is everything all right?

“Br’anna?” Adam murmured.  Charisma met Kent’s eyes with a cross between fear and consternation in her own.  She turned her attention to Turq, who had grabbed the stack of pizza boxes from the car. 

“Let’s get those into the kitchen,” Charisma instructed.  Kent took Adam and walked upstairs; Turq just nodded and followed Charisma, placing them on the table before stepping back.

“Will there be anything else, Senator?”

“Would you like to stay and share lunch with us Turq?”

“Oh no ma’am... thank you.  I had already eaten by the time Mr. Rockwell called.”

“Well, thank you for picking him and my son up.  I know you’re supposed to be off today.” 

“It wasn’t a problem ma’am... really.  I’ll pick you up at the regular time tomorrow?”  Charisma nodded.  “See you in the morning then, Senator.”

“Thank you Turq – drive safely.”

Turq touched her fingertips to her hair in salute and fled back down the steps to the warmth of the big car.  In another moment she and it were disappearing down the drive and out the gates.  Charisma’s shiver brought her back to an awareness of her surroundings, and she shut the door and remotely closed the gates.  Then she went to retrieve her staff from her office.

************

They were almost done with their impromptu lunch when Adam wandered downstairs rubbing his eyes.  Kent, being closest to the door and only peripherally involved in the conversation, heard him first.  He stood without ceremony and moved into the hallway to pick Adam up.  Adam wrapped his arms around Kent’s neck and held on tightly.  Kent hugged him back and kissed his head, then headed back into the kitchen.

“You want some pizza, Boy?” Kent asked as they crossed the threshold noticing Adam tightening his grip even as he looked around the room.

“There’s Mama’s big boy,” Charisma smiled even as she signaled to her staff to leave the room.  They took the hint, being long schooled in reading Charisma’s nonverbal cues, and in less than a minute of Adam’s arrival the kitchen was cleared of everyone but him and his parental units.

Adam reached for Charisma and she took him as a matter of course when Kent released him.  Then Kent went to pour Adam some milk while Charisma put a slice of pizza on a plate and set it in front of him.  Adam grabbed the slice in both hands and lifted it to his mouth.  When he had a mouthful he looked at Charisma.

“Mammma, ‘ere’s Bana?”

She frowned as she tried to filter out the food in his speech even as she chided, “Don’t talk with your mouth full, Son.”

He glowered and spit out the half-chewed bite of pizza, then poked out his lip. “Where’s Br’anna?” he asked again before shoving the bite back into his mouth.  Charisma and Kent made grossed out faces at one another, then turned back to Adam when he screeched, “MAMA!”

“Adam Rockwell!!  That’s enough from you; now settle down,” biting her lip when he teared up at her severe tone.  Charisma took a deep breath and softened her voice.  “We don’t act that way at the table, Son.  Now I don’t know where Brianna is; I haven’t seen her.”

“Adam saw.  And Pa.”

“Well that at least explains why he’s asking about her,” Charisma muttered to herself though Kent heard her words clearly.  She took a deep breath and looked at him.  “Should I even ask?”

“It was all perfectly innocent, Charisma.  We were walking down the Mall towards the Natural History Museum when Adam spotted her sitting on a bench outside the National Gallery.  He took off like a shot.”  Kent frowned.  “We may have to reconsider that whole leash idea.  Honestly, Charisma... he was gone before I realized what had happened.”

“Have you noticed it mostly happens when Brianna is around?  Specifically when he is trying to get to her?”

“BR’ANNA!!” Adam yelled with a giggle, continuing to stuff pizza into his mouth.  Charisma pinched her nose between her thumb and forefinger to avoid looking at his chipmunk-cheeked face.  Kent just shook his head and tried to wipe Adam’s face while the child squirmed to get away from him.

“I can’t say that I have; although now that you mention it....”  He let his voice trail off as his mind traced back the times he’d seen Adam run away from him or Charisma in recent days.  “I think you’re right,” he agreed.  “I wonder what is so fascinating about her to him.”

“Love Br’anna,” Adam stated with an emphatic nod of her head. “Br’anna good.”

Kent and Charisma exchanged a look.  “Well... I guess that explains that.”  Kent sighed.  “I know she’s got some kind of powerful magic – he climbed right up into her lap and fell asleep.  It’s why we ended up back here so early.  After discussing mundane things like the museums and the weather, Brianna pointed out that a visit to see the dinosaurs would have been a wasted effort while he was asleep.”

“That was the extent of your conversation?”

“Pretty much.  She must’ve been an actor in another life though.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Because I know she’s uneasy around me, but I don’t think anyone else would be able to pick it up from her actions or her attitude.”  A beat.  “I don’t think I would be able to tell if I didn’t already know.”

“Well, she did double major in theatre and the law.”  Kent’s eyebrows went into his hairline and he whistled low in his throat at Charisma’s words.

“That would explain a lot.  I’d like to hear about it some day.  I’d like to hear about a lot of things actually.  Maybe one day we can sit down and talk about some of the things we’ve missed in each other’s lives along the way.  In the meantime,” he continued before she could formulate a response, “I’ll take Adam upstairs and get him cleaned up so you can get back to work.”

Charisma sighed.  “Thanks.  You wouldn’t believe the work I should really get done before going back to work tomorrow.”

“Yes I would.  I’ve seen this every time you get ready to start a new session.”

“Yes, I guess you have,” Charisma chuckled.  “But I’m about done for the day.  Everything else can wait until tomorrow at this point.  What time is your train back?”

“Not til late. I wasn’t sure how the day was going to turn out so I gave myself plenty of time to cover all kinds of possibilities.”

“Would you... you’re welcome to stay in your room.”

“No,” came the whip shot answer.  “Not that I don’t appreciate the offer, but we’re not going to fall into old patterns if we’re going to do this right.  I would like to try and spend more time with Adam, but I’m not going to share living space with you when we’re separated.  It just wouldn’t be right.”

“If you think it’s best....”

“Charisma, I know it is and so do you.  Everything is going to be pretty much like it has been except that I will be living in Manhattan and visiting DC occasionally and not the other way around.  Oh... that reminds me – I need to get some movers in here to pack up and move the rest of my stuff from upstairs.  So if I could keep my key until that’s done...?”

“Absolutely.  Just let me know when and I’ll make sure to be out of your way that day.”

“PA!” Adam hollered breaking the tableau and making them both jump at his volume level.  Charisma cleared her throat and rose.

“Just leave everything.  I’ll take care of it when I’m done working.”

“Adam and I’ll go get cleaned up, then we’ll be in the family room playing... I dunno – something I’m sure he will kick my a... butt at.”  With that Kent picked Adam up out of his chair and held him at arms’ length as he made is way back upstairs.  Charisma followed them out.

“You may want to lock the bathroom door.  Remember he’s something of an exhibitionist given half a chance.”

Kent snorted.  “Good idea,” turning into Adam’s bathroom.  “We’ll be out in a few,” closing the door firmly behind them.  Charisma waited until she heard the snick of the lock, then she smirked and headed back into her office. It was time to wrap things up for the day.

Part 14